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Band 4.5

The bar chart shows the proportion of male and female teachers in six categories of educational setting in England in 2010.

The bar chart shows the proportion of male and female teachers in six categories of educational setting in England in 2010.
The bar chart provides information about what
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 and
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 are educated in
part
Use synonyms
 of
academic
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
show examples
.
According to
Linking Words
 the bar
chart
Add a comma
,chart
show examples
 there is
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 correlation between the
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 and
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
, in
fact
Add a comma
,fact
show examples
 in a
part
Use synonyms
 of
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
show examples
academic
Add a comma
,academic
show examples
 they have
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
. At the same time in basic level of
education
Use synonyms
 is the longest and shortest
percente
Correct your spelling
percentage
per cent
 than
another
Correct quantifier usage
others
show examples
. At the most basic level of
education
Use synonyms
,
that is
Linking Words
 Nursery/
Pre-
Correct your spelling
Preschool
show examples
school
Use synonyms
, the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 is
women
Use synonyms
 about 98%
however
Linking Words
 the lowest
percentage
Use synonyms
 is
men
Use synonyms
 about 3%.İn
premery
Correct your spelling
primary
school
Use synonyms
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
women
Use synonyms
 is going to down
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 three
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 about 95% and the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
men
Use synonyms
 going to up with two
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 about 5%. Between pre-
school
Use synonyms
 and
primery
Correct your spelling
primary
school
Use synonyms
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 and
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
diped
Correct your spelling
dropped
. About secondary
school
Use synonyms
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
almost
Add a missing verb
is almost
show examples
 close together the
number
Use synonyms
 of
women
Use synonyms
 is 48% and the
number
Use synonyms
 of
men
Use synonyms
 is 45%. After that at the final level of
education
Use synonyms
 in college
Use synonyms
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
 of
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
famele
Correct your spelling
females
Use synonyms
Add a comma
,percent
show examples
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
about
Change preposition
in
show examples
 45%.private training
institude
Correct your spelling
institute
 the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
men
Use synonyms
 is 48% again the
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of
men
Use synonyms
 is growing and
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
Use synonyms
women
Correct quantifier usage
number of women
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 45%.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
 the
last
Linking Words
part
Use synonyms
 of
education
Use synonyms
 is
universty
Correct your spelling
university
 the
Use synonyms
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of
women
Use synonyms
 is 25% and the
men
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 65% with the highest
percentage
Use synonyms
 in that
part
Use synonyms
 of
education
Use synonyms
.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, part, percent, education, school, women, men, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 8 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 7 times.
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