Some poeple say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in thie free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on thier own. ' Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#poeple #parents #children #part #group #activities #thie #time #thier

It is known that every family growing to their

chilren

Correct your spelling

children

different type. Some parents want their

children

join to organised group activities others

are

Verb problem

show examples

not.

this

essay will explain both organized class activities and free time. On the one hand, group activities are so important to

children

Change noun form

children's

show examples

growing

Replace the word

growth

show examples

. İt

makes

Verb problem

apply

show examples

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

show examples

their relationship, ability and realize. That's why most

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

parents

choosing

Wrong verb form

choose

show examples

this

way.

For example

, my friend's son who is 12 years old, was very shy with another citizen

then

his father made a decision for his son and the boy started group game therapy. when the boy played his friend that loss

shining by

Wrong verb form

shone

show examples

day by,

finally

Correct word choice

and finally

show examples

he overcame

Change preposition

apply

show examples

his character.

On the other hand

,we have to let

children

be free people in their free time. İt has

positive

Add an article

a positive

show examples

side and negative side

firstly

, they may get bored and live depressed because all

children

Add a verb

arechildren

werechildren

show examples

not similar some are strong others are not.

Secondly

, if they

may

Verb problem

are

show examples

not

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

depresed

Correct your spelling

depressed

, they will be strong people because they will learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

For instance

, my lately more douth played

everytime

Replace the word

every time

show examples

alone and she has strong ecology. it was thanks to playing alone, not needing others' friends.

To sum up

, the to way is so important because the

bogth

Correct your spelling

both

booth

is correct. In my

opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

show examples

we have to the best way to

according to

children

. Some

children

want to play with friends because they can be happy with friends

while

games. They can learn a lot of things thanks to games.

Submitted by ares.grup on Wed Oct 04 2023

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coherence cohesion

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coherence cohesion

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task achievement

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lexical resource

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grammatical range accuracy

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Your opinion

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some poeple say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in thie free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on thier own. ' Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

Some people think that advertisement between films is wasting time and some people says it has lots of benefits. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view.

In many part of the world, children are given more freedom than in the past. Is this a positive or negative development? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while other think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your opinion.

some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.