the plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant

The following maps
are showed
Wrong verb form
show
show examples
the changes
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
have been made to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Grange Park between
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
1920 and today.
Overall
, lots of changes have
occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
as well as
additions, like an amphitheatre for concerts, a cafe and a
water
feature. It is seen that the fountain has been replaced by the rose garden which is surrounded by four places for seats, and it is located in the centre of the
map
. An amphitheatre for concerts is applied
instead
of the stage for musicians, and it is placed
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the left side of the
map
, in the centre.
In addition
, the garden rose is located on the
right
of the north entrance, and it has been changed into a cafe.
Furthermore
, the pond for
water
plants, which was located on the upper
right
side of the
map
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
has been reconstructed into a children's play area. As considered to the glasshouse that was placed on the southest
right
area of the
map
, it was deconstructed and a
water
feature took its place.
Moreover
, the north and south entrances have remained the same, and
thay
Correct your spelling
they
have added an underground entrance for
car
Correct article usage
a car
show examples
park located
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
right
side of the
water
feature.
Submitted by nikoletta.louka on

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task achievement
The introduction can be improved by providing clearer information about the changes in the park over time.
lexical resource
Try to use more varied vocabulary and phrasing throughout the essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Be careful with the word choice and accuracy of descriptions. For example, the amphitheatre is not applied, but rather built.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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