21.The bar chart below shows the percentages of three groups of Japanese children taking part in four kinds of activities in 2018. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The bar graph displays the different age ranges of Japanese children
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
ride
Wrong verb form
rode
bike
, Fix the agreement mistake
bikes
play
Wrong verb form
played
computer
games
, read and watch
Wrong verb form
watched
TV
in 2018.
Overall
, watching TV
had a greater proportion than any other activity, followed by reading and riding bike
, Add an article
a bike
while
playing computer
games
had the lowest percentage.
Kids
from 5 to 8 years old, the activity that they did the most was watching Change preposition
For kids
TV
, with a proportion of 92%, while
the rest of the activities have a similar percentage; reading with approximately 63%, riding bikes with just 1% less than reading and three-fifth of children play computer
games
.
Children
in the age range of 9 to 11, the activity that they liked the most was watching Change preposition
For children
TV
, with a portion of four-fifth
, followed by reading with Fix the agreement mistake
four-fifths
a
70% and Correct article usage
apply
then
riding bike
with just above 60%, Add an article
a bike
lastly
are the
Correct article usage
a
computer
games
with nearly 58%. Furthermore
, a little above 80% of people from 12 to 16 rode bikes, 80% watched television and a
10% Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
less
Correct quantifier usage
apply
reads
. Correct subject-verb agreement
read
Finally
, only two-fifth
of individuals from 12 to 16 played Correct your spelling
two-fifths
computer
games
.Submitted by elenazheng1211 on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, games, tv with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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