IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The chart below shows the percentage of households owning four types of electronic devices between 1995 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

#minutes #percentage #households #four #devices #summarise #information #report #features #comparisons
Based on the information given in the question I do understand over the period of 10
years
 the
usage
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
electronic equipment
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 changed.
Usage
 of tablets starting from 2002 around have increased much over the period of
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 12
years
 to 2015, I could see
stady
Correct your spelling
steady
 growth compared to the
usage
 of MP3 Players.
Usage
 of
mobile
Add an article
the mobile
show examples
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
 started in 1995, within 5
years
 to
years
 2000
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased
8
Change preposition
by 8
show examples
% around to 70% and beyond
years
 2000 onwards have increased from 70% to 90%. I could observe year 2000 onwards a moderate
increased
Replace the word
increase
show examples
.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
usage
 of tablets in
this
 period from 2002 to 2015
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 increased at a higher rate. I
observe
Wrong verb form
observed
show examples
 from 1995
onwards
Rephrase
apply
show examples
to 2015
have
Wrong verb form
it has
show examples
 increased stady.
On
Change preposition
Overall
show examples
overall
 all four electronic
devices
Change noun form
devices'
show examples
usage
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 increased
upwards
Rephrase
however
show examples
,
Rephrase
apply
show examples
how ever
Correct your spelling
however
show examples
 compared to
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 three products
usage
 of MP3 Player has increased only up to 30%
Submitted by thiliniranatunga1994 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words years, usage with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 8 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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