Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Some individuals believe that sugary
products
should be more expensive, and with
this
increasement
Correct your spelling
increase
in
price
Add a comma
price,
show examples
there would be a
consume
Replace the word
consumption
show examples
reduction. I totally agree with
this
statement not only because
sugar
has a direct
impact
on the public
health
care system, but
also
because
sugar
has an addiction power and should follow the same rules as
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
vice
products
. The main reason I support the idea of
sugar
products
more expensive,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is because of the
impact
on the public
health
care system. It is well known that
sugar
causes a series of
health
problems
to those who consume more than the recommended, and unfortunately, it brings a
several
Correct word choice
large
show examples
number of people to the hospitals every year.
For instance
, there are numerous cases of
deseases
Correct your spelling
diseases
related to
sugar
,
such
as obesity and diabetes.
Furthermore
,
sugar
is considered a substance that causes addiction, and brings a negative
impact
to the population. There are a range of different rules and laws related to substances that cause addiction
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and
brings
Correct subject-verb agreement
bring
show examples
health
issues to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society, and
sugar
should be treated the same way those
products
are.
For example
,
sugar
causes
health
problems
just like alcohol and
tabacco
Correct your spelling
tobacco
, but the
sugar
industry is not penalized for those
problems
. In conclusion, I strongly agree that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sugar
products
should be more expensive because of the negative
impact
on the
health
care system of our country, and
also
to be fair with other industries that pay high taxes because of the
problems
caused by their
products
, just like
sugar
does.
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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sugar consumption
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • encourage
  • expensive
  • reduce
  • effectively
  • discourage
  • tight budget
  • purchasing
  • disproportionately
  • lower-income individuals
  • healthier food choices
  • demand
  • regardless
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