IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accomodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accomodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#percentage #households #accomodation #england #wales #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given bar chart
depics
Correct your spelling
depicts
depict
 information about the proportion of households’s housing status ( owned and rented) between 1918 and 2011 in England and Wales.
Overall
Linking Words
, the families that have their own home showed an upward trend
while
Linking Words
they
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
 who rented experienced a downward trend.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, both of them have
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same
number
Use synonyms
 in the middle of the given period. In the first half period, early 19s, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
family
Change to a plural noun
families
show examples
 that rent a residence was higher than in that of rented, nearly four times at approximately 78%.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 decreased gradually to about 68% (1939 and 1953) and
slighlty
Correct your spelling
slightly
 less
60
Change preposition
than 60
show examples
% (1961)
while
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of rent climbed significantly around 10% every year from 1981 until 1971 which had a proportion between just over 20% and 50%, respectively.
Conversely
Linking Words
, in the following period, the
number
Use synonyms
 of ownership of
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 ascended dramatically
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 approximately 60% (1981) and 68% (1991 and 2001), overlapping
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
 that of rented which just under 40%.
Correct your spelling
Even though
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
 the
number
Use synonyms
 in that of rent decreased slightly, it still
remain
Change the verb form
remains
show examples
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 top position
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • predominant
  • accommodation
  • trend
  • shift
  • households
  • homeownership
  • economic and social circumstances
  • interwar period
  • post-World War II
  • government policies
  • urbanization
  • public policy
  • economic prosperity
  • tipping point
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