The bar chart beow shows the percentage of Australian men and women in diffrent age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010,

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart beow shows the percentage of Australian men and women in diffrent age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010,

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The given bar chart provides information about the proportion of Australian males and females in various age categories who did exercise regularly by 2010.

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be seen that the chart illustrates 6 groups, including 15 to 24, 25 to 34, 35 to 44, 45 to 54, and 65 and over in which the total percentage of female are higher than

men

Use synonyms

, except the first

group

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the three female groups from 35 to 64 made up the most regular in physical activity.

While

Linking Words

the proportion of

men

Use synonyms

is lower than females,

men

Use synonyms

from 15 to 24 accounted for 52.8 compared to 47.7

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

in women.

Nonetheless

Linking Words

, the difference between males and females in the

last

Linking Words

group

Use synonyms

, including

Correct pronoun usage

those 65

show examples

and over

are

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

insignificant, amounting to 46.7 and 47.1 respectively. The percentage of

men

Use synonyms

saw a decrease from 52.8 in the first

group

Use synonyms

to 39.5 in 35 to 44

while

Linking Words

the amount of women rose sharply to 52.5 and continued steadily to 53.3 and 53 in the ages of 45 to 54 and 55 to 65.

However

Linking Words

, the proportion of males in the latter

group

Use synonyms

was 45.1

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

matty.ebadiiFri Oct 27 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words men, group with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

188 words

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The bar chart beow shows the percentage of Australian men and women in diffrent age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010,

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think it's better to choose friends who always have the same opinion as them. Other people believe it's good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

‘It is important for foreigners to know something about the history and culture of the country they live in.’ To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?

It is sometimes argued that too many students go to university, while others claim that a university education should be a universal right. Discuss both sides of the argument and give your own opinion.