People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?

#people #cities #face #life #governments #move #towns

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In modern life, Most

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apply

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people

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transfer to live in large

cities

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to earn for living and

also

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cope with several negative issues in their daily

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

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This

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essay will discuss two major

problems

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traffic

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jams

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and

pollution

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, which I believe the

government

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should encourage

people

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to move to regional areas.

Firstly

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Traffic

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jams

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during

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G hours

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are

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the

most

Correct word choice

biggest

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problems

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in many large

cities

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when

people

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go to work or study at the same time.

Moreover

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, vehicles have to wait for a long time to move out of the jam.

This

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situation makes

people

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stressed because they are late for work or school and they

also

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get psychologically affected

about

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show examples

education,

personal

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and personal

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life.

Furthermore

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people

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have to face air

pollution

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day by day. It is caused by the release of harmful chemicals and particles into the atmosphere, for

examples

Fix the agreement mistake

example

show examples

, a result of human activities ,transportation, industrial processes and the burning of fossil fuels. In my opinion, the

government

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should attend to solve these

problems

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. If

people

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use public transportation, the

traffic

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jams

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will be decreased.

According to

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this

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theory, they have to build more roads or subways like Japan where

people

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always go to work on time.

Besides

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that, removing

people

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Change preposition

from

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smaller regional towns by increasing facilities at that place and constructing new companies or factories to create many jobs for local inhabitants. From that, the large population will be equally divided into rural areas and air

pollution

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Wrong verb form

will be

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improved. The

government

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must be policies that

favor

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favour

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rural areas so that

people

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see there are many opportunities to live there like in big

cities

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. In conclusion,

traffic

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jams

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and air

pollution

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are two of the serious

problems

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people

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who live in big

cities

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. I think that the

government

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should build public transportation or move individuals to

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

appropriate

Add an article

an appropriate

the appropriate

show examples

solution for those issues.

Submitted by khoiminhnguyen1411 on Thu Nov 02 2023

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task achievement

Your main points are clear and relevant to the topic. However, you could provide more specific examples to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Overall, the logical structure of your essay is good. Try to improve the transitions between paragraphs to enhance the cohesion.

lexical resource

Your use of vocabulary is satisfactory, but you could incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary to enhance your writing.

grammatical range

Your grammar is generally accurate, but there are some errors in sentence structure and word choice. Pay more attention to verb tense consistency and word form.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

307 words

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People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?

Your opinion

The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

Smoking is a major cause of serious illness and death throughout the world today. In the interest of the public health, government should ban cigarettes and other tobacco products. To what extent do you agree or disagree?