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Band 4.5

The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.

The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.
#bar #shares #expenditures #five #categories #states #canada #kingdom #japan #year
The vertical chart makes
comparison
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a comparison
the comparison
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 between
five
 different countries, namely the United
States
,
Canada
, and the United Kingdom about their expenditure on
five
 categories in 2009.
Overall
, it is noticeable that
in
Change preposition
apply
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all
five
 countries allocated most of their budget
on
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to
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 housing,
while
 the reverse was true for Health care. In detail, in terms of the amount of money that expenditures on Food, the figure for Japan was the highest at 23%,
while
 the lowest was observed in the United
States
 at 13%.The proportion of expenditures for Food
by
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in
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 the United Kingdom was over 20%, which
higher
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is higher
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 than that in the figure
Canada
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in Canada
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 by 6%.
Moreover
, the United
States
 allocated more than 25% of their budget
in
Change preposition
to
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 housing, followed by the United Kingdom, Japan and
Canada
 at 24%, 22% and approximately 20% respectively. When it comes to transportation, there was 17% of
money
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the money
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 that the United
States
 spent on,
whereas
Canada
 spent 20% on their amount of money which is twice as much as in the figure for Japan. Health care and Clothing witnessed only a fraction in the proportion of expenditures by all
five
 countries, which
around
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is around
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 3% to 7% for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Health care and 4% to 6% for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Clothing.
Submitted by phongnguyenthanh630 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words five, states, canada with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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