The increase in the production of consumer goods result in damage to the natural environment, what are the causes of this and what can be done to solve it?
It is true that the growth of producing consumer products has negative impacts on the natural environment including
air
polltion
and water contamination. There are several solutions Correct your spelling
pollution
should
be adopted to improve Correct pronoun usage
that should
this
situation.
There are two primary reasons why the increase in the production of consumer goods is harmful to the atmosphere and the underground water. Firstly
, the booming
in the population leads to an upward trend in consumption, resulting in Replace the word
boom
the
climb in Correct article usage
a
producing
without water purification systems. Replace the word
production
Consequently
, a huge amount of untreated industrial waste is released into the environment damaging either marine habitats or the air
. Secondly
, the lack of strict regulations on manufatories
is attributed to the following factors, causing Correct your spelling
manufactories
manufactures
the
improper sewage disposal Correct article usage
apply
producing
harmful contaminants leaked into the ecosystem. Change the verb form
to produce
For example
, because of the toxic waste revealed from Vedan
factory, tons of type of fish became Correct article usage
the Vedan
extinction
in 2009.
Fortunately, there are many actions that could be taken to address the above-mentioned issues. The first solution would be to raise people's awareness about overconsumption via broadcasts or national channels, sharing why and how residents can balance their goods needs to mitigate the environmental Replace the word
extinct
affects
. As Replace the word
effects
the
result, people will be Correct article usage
a
concious
Correct your spelling
conscious
their
behaviour and have proper Change preposition
of their
changings
in shopping. The second measure would relate to the Replace the word
changes
government
role in applying appropriate fines to businesses lacking Change noun form
government's
of
waste treatment plants to steer contaminants away from Remove the preposition
apply
releasing
. Replace the word
release
For example
, thanks to industrial substances regulation programmes from Japanese
government in 1900, Japan was successful in cutting off the Add an article
the Japanese
air
pollution rate by 20% compared to this
in 1890.
In conclusion, various measures can be taken from
authorities to tackle environmental issues involving Change preposition
by
air
pollution and contaminated groundwater. To be able to achieve better results in environment
conservation in the future, people need to be fully informed and educated Replace the word
environmental
the
negative problems, Change preposition
about the
along with
the
Correct article usage
apply
governemt
supervision.Correct your spelling
government
Submitted by nguyenmysam722001 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
The essay does not adequately address all parts of the task and may have a narrow focus or slight deviation from the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure is somewhat clear, with some progression of ideas, although cohesion could be improved.
lexical resource
The essay demonstrates a reasonably wide range of vocabulary, although there is room for improvement in terms of accuracy and appropriateness of word choice.
grammatical range
There are errors in sentence structure, punctuation, and word forms, and the essay would benefit from more varied and complex sentence structures.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!