Some poeople say History is one of the most important school subject and people think that, in todays;s world subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the digital era, the use of
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
of
things
Capitalize word
Things
show examples
is a universal phenomenon. There is indeed an ongoing debate around the
school
curicula
Correct your spelling
curricula
curriculum
changes to meet
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
show examples
needs.
Although
some people believe that
History
is the most crucial subject, I stand with those who argue that these days
Science
and Technology are way more necessary to teach in
school
.
Firstly
, subjects
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
an integral part of
school
curicula
Correct your spelling
curricula
curriculum
. One of the
excisisting
Correct your spelling
existing
exciting
subjects is
History
which
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
been taught for years since elementary
school
.
History
might be
usufel
Correct your spelling
useful
in
adressing
Correct your spelling
addressing
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
show examples
trajectory, the
ancentors
Correct your spelling
ancestors
, and
value
Correct article usage
the value
show examples
of traditional stories.
For instance
, centuries ago Indonesia was fighting for its
independency
Correct your spelling
independence
show examples
, these
story
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stories
show examples
explain
about
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apply
show examples
how to plan
extraordinary
Add an article
an extraordinary
show examples
yet effective
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
to survive with the limited equipment available. It is indeed
Correct article usage
a wonderfull
show examples
wonderfull
Correct your spelling
wonderful
lesson about teamwork, coordination,
comitment
Correct your spelling
commitment
and dedication that
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
can now reflect on. Even though
history
taught
students
about certain
surviving
Replace the word
survival
show examples
skills
, those
skills
are just not enough to survive in
this
technological era.
Science
and technology must be
adress
Correct your spelling
addressed
to
equipt
Correct your spelling
equip
show examples
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
with practical
skills
.
These skill
Change the determiner
This skill
These skills
show examples
will help and
familirise
Correct your spelling
familiarise
familiarize
students
to meet
todays
Change noun form
today's
show examples
needs in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
working
life
. Many countries have relied on
evidence based
Add a hyphen
evidence-based
show examples
information as their foundation of knowledge.
Science
discovery given the basic
relieble
Correct your spelling
reliable
sources that people can believe on.
For example
, in Europe, children
introduce
Wrong verb form
are introduced
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
simple
Correct article usage
the simple
show examples
science
chemical
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of chemical
show examples
reactions,
about
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apply
show examples
nature, animal
life
circle
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circles
show examples
, and plant photosinthesis
since
Change preposition
from
show examples
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
early age. Evident has
proved
Correct your spelling
proven
show examples
that
this
science
class enhance
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
logical thinking.
Additionally
,
technologies
Fix the agreement mistake
technology
show examples
can not be
seperated
Correct your spelling
separated
from our daily
life
. By teaching
this
in
school
,
students
can learn how to utilise technologies responsibly, how to operate
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, and how to identify the problem or
fraugt
Correct your spelling
fraught
that might
happened
Change the verb form
happen
show examples
. In conclusion,
history
Correct article usage
a history
show examples
subject might help
students
on thinking about several
surviving
Replace the word
survival
show examples
skills
and respect their
ancentors
Correct your spelling
ancestors
.
However
,
historical
Correct article usage
the historical
show examples
subject is
todays
Correct your spelling
today
not quite relevant
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
worlds
Change noun form
world's
show examples
global developments. In order to
prepared
Change the verb
prepare
show examples
students
with
practicle
Correct your spelling
practical
skills
for the upcoming future
life
,
science
and technology are the way more important to teach in
school
.
Submitted by ambercampbell.xx25 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that your arguments are directly addressing the task prompt. Make sure to provide a balanced view on both the importance of history and the importance of science and technology.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is fairly clear, with a well-structured introduction and conclusion. However, there are some issues with the cohesion of the supporting paragraphs. Work on transitioning between ideas more smoothly to improve coherence.
Lexical Resource
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary and generally uses appropriate words and phrases. Continue to expand your vocabulary to include more varied and sophisticated language.
Grammatical Range
There are some grammatical errors and awkward phrasings throughout the essay. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement and sentence structure to improve grammatical accuracy.

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