IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spend their weekly income in 1968 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relavant

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The given bar chart provides data on the expenditures of families in one specific country in two years; 1968 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, in 1968 the highest proportion of
family’s
Correct article usage
a family’s
show examples
 weekly
income
Use synonyms
 was allocated to food,
while
Linking Words
 in 2018 the highest percentage of
income
Use synonyms
 was related to leisure.
Also
Linking Words
, the expenditures related to the household were the only category that did not experience any in two given years.
According to
Linking Words
 the bar chart, in 1968 food accounted for nearly 35% of
income
Use synonyms
, which was the maximum amount among other categories, but reduced by 50% in 2018.
Moreover
Linking Words
, fuel and power were responsible for a little higher than 5% of
income
Use synonyms
 in 1968,
then
Linking Words
 dropped slightly and stood at approximately 5
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Also
Linking Words
, the trend related to clothing and
footware
Correct your spelling
footwear
 was similar to food and decreased from 10% to 5%. Regarding the bar chart, a tripling could be witnessed in expenditure related to leisure, from 7% in 1968 to about 21% in 2018, which was the maximum amount in 2018.
In addition
Linking Words
, expenditures for housing and transport nearly doubled, and reached 18% and 13%, respectively.
Also
Linking Words
, families spent the same proportion of their
income
Use synonyms
 on household goods, which was about 7% in both years.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words income with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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