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Band 6.5

The pie charts below show the comparison of different kinds energy production of France in two years.

The pie charts below show the comparison of different kinds energy production of France in two years.
#show #comparison #kinds #energy #production #france #two #years
The pie charts provide
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 comparison of various types of
energy
production
 in four different parts, namely nuclear,
petro
Correct your spelling
petrol
, gas, and coal in France between 1995 and 2005. All in all, it is vividly depicted that the proportion of the
energy
production
who
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 materials in
petro
 fell sharply in 1995 and 2005,
while
 the
energy
production
who
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 stuffs in coal,
nuchear
Correct your spelling
nuclear
 and gas increased sharply during the period. regarding materials by
energy
production
, the rate of
kinds
 in
nuchear
Correct your spelling
nuclear
 increased slowly from 6,40% to 10.10% in 1995 and in 2005.
Likewise
, the
kinds
 in the gas rose steadily from 29,63% to 30,31%,
where
Correct word choice
whereas
show examples
, those materials who
kinds
 in coal increased steadily from 29,80% to 30,31% in the same period. In terms of
energy
production
, the
kinds
 rate of
petro
 decreased significantly from 29,27% in 1995 to 19,55% in 2005.
However
, those
energy
production
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
kinds
 of
petro
 differentiated numbers
around
Change preposition
by around
show examples
 10% in the same period.
Submitted by musa.nuwa on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, production, petro, kinds with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "comparison" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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