IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

(Pie. The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. 39% 19% 48% 13% 71% 53% North America South America Europe Africa 84% 32% 15% Central Asia South East Asia Industrial Use Agricultural Use 100% + Domestic Use

(Pie. The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. 39% 19% 48% 13% 71% 53% North America South America Europe Africa 84% 32% 15% Central Asia South East Asia Industrial Use Agricultural Use 100% + Domestic Use
#show #percentage #water #purposes #six #areas #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons #america #europe #africa #asia
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie charts compare the differences in the proportion of
water
Use synonyms
 consumption for three main purposes in North and South
America
Use synonyms
, Europe, Africa, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
, and South East
Asia
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, most
water
Use synonyms
 is utilized for industrial
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
 in North
America
Use synonyms
 and Europe, whilst other remaining parts primarily use
water
Use synonyms
 for farming.
Moreover
Linking Words
, domestic
water
Use synonyms
 is the lowest figure in South East
Asia
Use synonyms
. Regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
North
America
Use synonyms
 and Europe, about
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of
water
Use synonyms
 consumption is for industry, accounting for 48% and 53% respectively.
Water
Use synonyms
 is catered for
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
,
however
Linking Words
, is always lower than the others.
In addition
Linking Words
, the amount of
water
Use synonyms
 for irrigation in North
America
Use synonyms
 triples
this
Linking Words
 counterpart for domestic
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
. Most
water
Use synonyms
 is used for farming in
remaining
Correct article usage
the remaining
show examples
 areas, with the highest figure (88%) belonging to Central
Asia
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
water
Use synonyms
 for
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
 is usually higher than for industry, ranging from
2
Correct article usage
a 2
show examples
% gap in Africa and Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 to
9
Correct article usage
a 9
show examples
% gap in South
America
Use synonyms
. In South East
Asia
Use synonyms
,
in contrast
Linking Words
, there is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 opposite pattern in
water
Use synonyms
 usage, at 12% for industrial
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
 and at 7% for domestic use.
Submitted by cdiemquynh009 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, america, asia with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: