The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The bar chart illustrates several number

changed

Wrong verb form

changes

show examples

for the people that born in Australia and other countries and

resident

Fix the agreement mistake

residents

show examples

in urban, rural and

town

Fix the agreement mistake

towns

show examples

in 1995 and 2010. It is obvious that

living

Correct pronoun usage

those living

show examples

in the cities had the highest percentage in both years, and

who

Correct pronoun usage

those who

show examples

born

Add a missing verb

were born

show examples

in foreign countries and lived in rural areas and towns decreased in 2010,

however

Linking Words

, the former was more dramatic.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the ratio of people who lived in the cities and who

born

Add a missing verb

were born

show examples

outside and in Australia

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

60 and 50% respectively in 1995, the former remained constant and the latter slightly dropped to 50% after 15 years.

Secondly

Linking Words

, those who

born

Add a missing verb

were born

show examples

outside of Australia and lived in rural areas took 40% of the society in 1995,

nevertheless

Linking Words

, it lowered to one-fourth of the percentage which became less than 10% 15 years ago.

In addition

Linking Words

, the ratio diminished mildly from about 18% to 10%.

chaoweikevinThu Nov 23 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

149 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Percentage
Demographic
Trends
Urban areas
Rural areas
Town
Native-born
Foreign-born
Migration patterns
Economic factors
Government policies
Increase
Decrease
Steady
Peak
Trough
Time frame
Significant changes
Distribution
Notable

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The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Government spending or arts is waste or government should on infrastructure. Discuss both point of view

Nowadays many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grand parents can take care of their children, while others think childcare centres provide the best care. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

It is the responsibility of schools to teach children good behaviour in addition to providing formal education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

6.Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

The rise of social media has affacted personal, relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages.