It is believed that there is a negative impact of tourism on tourist spots which is majorly due to the behaviour of people who visit there. Why do you think that people behave badly when they visit some places? What measures can be taken to resolve this issue? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Firstly
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, most rich
people
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are easily visiting a lot of
places
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by car and
airplane
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aeroplane
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.
People
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always show off their money and try to insult poor guys. He does not speak properly and if he speaks
then
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disrespects others. As per a survey by BBC News, 90
percent
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per cent
show examples
of tourist
places
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are dirty, because when the tourists visit those
places
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they an eating lot of items and throw waste there and
also
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some
people
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drink excessive alcohol
then
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fight with each other and local guys and
also
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break
them
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their
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shops and properties.
Hence
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, numerous villages in Himachal Pradesh banned tourists
due to
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creating a lot of pollution, uncleanness, and rude
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
.
On the other hand
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, the government has taken some action against those
people
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and
also
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banned smoking and alcohol drinking in public
places
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and
also
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strict action on them they spread the dirtiness in those
places
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. The administration added the dustbins with different types
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of color
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color
Fix the agreement mistake
colors
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with instructions and
also
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guided the public on how they use dustbins. As per a report by Times of India, Indore
city
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is the number one rank in cleanness
city
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in India, because there are public awareness and guides to other and how to clean the
city
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. They have achieved
this
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rank in the
last
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2 years.
As a result
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, we learned from the Indore
people
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how to clean the
city
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and maintain it. In conclusion, some
people
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are converting beautiful
places
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into worse
places
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due to
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their
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
and habits. The governments and local authorities have
also
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taken action against those
people
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and
also
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banned smoking and alcohol in public
places
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. They have a guide to the public on how to tackle those
people
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if they are doing anything wrong with them.
Submitted by lavneet.kumar45 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
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Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but could be more clearly defined. The introduction should clearly set out the topics to be discussed, whilst the conclusion should succinctly summarize the points made within the body of the essay without introducing new information.
Coherence and Cohesion
Main points are somewhat supported by examples or explanations, but these need to be further developed and more closely related to the question prompt. It is important to provide clear explanations and use specific, relevant examples to back up each point made.
Task Achievement
While the essay attempts to address the question, the ideas presented are not fully developed and are at times difficult to understand due to issues with language accuracy and sentence construction. For improved task achievement, ensure that the essay provides a thorough and complete response to all parts of the prompt.
Task Achievement
While some ideas are relevant, the development of these ideas is hindered by a lack of clarity and comprehensiveness. To improve, ensure that each paragraph contributes to the overall argument by clearly presenting and elaborating on ideas relevant to the question.
Task Achievement
The essay includes some relevant examples; however, they need to be explicitly linked to the main ideas and integrated more smoothly into the discussion. Specific examples strengthen an argument and provide concrete evidence to support the points made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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