IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The graphs below show the unemployment rate of citizens in the US with a further classification displaying average salary per week in 2005.

The graphs below show the unemployment rate of citizens in the US with a further classification displaying average salary per week in 2005.
#graphs #show #unemployment #rate #citizens #classification #salary #week
The table
illustartes
Correct your spelling
illustrates
budget
Correct article usage
the budget
show examples
 of
policy
Add an article
the policy
show examples
 during a period from 2017 to 2018 in million.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the pie chart below shows money was spent
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 that period.
Overall
, the police
budget
 in 2018 spent more money than in
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2017 in all three cases. Meanwhile, the pie
shart
Correct your spelling
chart
show examples
 shows that in 2017 they spent more
their
Change preposition
of their
show examples
 money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
officers
Change noun form
officers'
officer's
show examples
 and
staff
Change noun form
staff's
show examples
 salaries. From 2017 to 2018 all three sources
named
Verb problem
apply
show examples
National Government, Local Taxes and other sources
Verb problem
apply
show examples
was slightly increase
Change the verb form
was slightly increased
show examples
.
This
 slight glow
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
big
Add an article
a big
show examples
 impact on
total
Change the article
a total
the total
show examples
 number of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 two years. When
Police
Correct article usage
the Police
show examples
Budget
 in 2017
tottaly counted
Verb problem
totalled
show examples
 304.7m , number of
budget
 in 2018 was
approximetely
Correct your spelling
approximately
 more
to
Change preposition
than
show examples
 15m and accounted
318.6
Change preposition
for 318.6
show examples
m . As can
been
Change the verb form
be
show examples
 seen in the pie chart, in both of the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
invest
Wrong verb form
invested
show examples
 17%
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 buildings and transport.
Also
, they decrease
salaries
Correct article usage
the salaries
show examples
 of officers and staff in the next year , to have
opportunity
Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 increase
budget
Correct article usage
the budget
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 technology.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words budget with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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