The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the percentage of greenhouse gas emissions that result from this energy use

#first #energy #australian #household #second #percentage #greenhouse #gas #emissions

The two pie charts illustrate

energy

consumption, and

as a result

, the

greenhouse

gas

release in an average Australian household.

Energy

is mainly utilized in six distinct areas, namely heating, cooling, water heating, lighting, refrigeration, and other electrical appliances.

Overall

, the most striking part would be that 42% of the

energy

usage is

due to

heating which is the greatest segment,

however

this

segment is responsible for just 15% of the

greenhouse

gas

release.

Additionally

, it is noticeable that the slightest slice of the chart is allocated to cooling utilization with only 2%,

as well as

3% in the latter chart.

Additionally

, no connection can be seen between

energy

usage and

greenhouse

gas

emissions.

Furthermore

, 7% of

energy

usage belongs to refrigeration,

whereas

this

amount is doubled in

greenhouse

gas

emissions, unlike the amount of water heating which is significantly the same in both charts

Submitted by maryam.niknamm on Sun Dec 03 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "additionally".

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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, greenhouse, gas with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 4 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

145 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the percentage of greenhouse gas emissions that result from this energy use

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Men should go to work and women place is in the home. To what extend do you agree or disagree

Some people say that Ebooks and modern technology will totally replace traditional newspapers and magazines to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, an increasing number of people with health problems are using alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their normal doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Children at secondary school are often taken on visits to museums, zoo and concerts and sometimes even to other countries. What do you think the advantages and disadvantages of such visits are?

Some people believe that the best way to solve environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other private vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?