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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentage #water #purposes #six #areas #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The pie charts illustrate the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
water
Use synonyms
 used in three categories plant, agricultural and household in six different world
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that
developing
Correct article usage
the developing
show examples
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 used
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 the
highest
Correct word choice
most
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
agricultural,
while
Linking Words
developed
Correct article usage
the developed
show examples
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 used
water
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the
plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants
show examples
, and the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
water
Use synonyms
 used in
household
Correct article usage
the household
show examples
 category for the lowest in
six
Correct article usage
the six
show examples
 world
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
. The
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
water
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
agricultural
Replace the word
agriculture
show examples
 in Africa, Central and South East Asia were higher than
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
area
Use synonyms
, which were 84%, 88% and 81% respectively, and South America had 71%.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the two developed
Use synonyms
area
Change to a plural noun
areas
show examples
, North America and Europe were lower than
developing
Correct article usage
the developing
show examples
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
, which had 39% and 32% respectively, these figures were even less than 40%.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of
water
Use synonyms
 used in
plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants
show examples
, which developed country more than developing country. in spite of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
North
American
Correct your spelling
America
show examples
 was less by 5%
with
Change preposition
than
show examples
 Europe country,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
these two countries had 48% and 53%
respectively
Rephrase
apply
show examples
industrial
water
Use synonyms
, compared with
remainder
Correct article usage
the remainder
show examples
countries
Change preposition
of countries
show examples
 were both nearly 10%, those countries were more than nearly a quadruple. It was noticeable the
proportion
Use synonyms
 of household
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
water
Use synonyms
 consumption
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
lower (all of those below
than
Change preposition
apply
show examples
20%) than other categories in these areas shown in the graph.
Submitted by ur790609922 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words proportion, water, area with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • water consumption
  • agricultural, industrial, domestic
  • usage patterns
  • developed vs developing regions
  • irrigation systems
  • climate factors
  • percentage breakdown
  • water management
  • sustainability
  • residential water use
  • efficiency
  • charts comparison
  • water-intensive
  • water scarcity
  • resource allocation
  • desalination
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