Many people believe that playing games and watching TV programs is beneficial but others say it doesn't improve the mental ability of children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Children are the backbone of every nation. Many claim that playing
games
and watching TV series
bring enormous benefits
to children whereas
others say that it cannot develop the mental ability of toddlers. I partially agree with this
statement and this
essay shall discuss it briefly in the following reasons.
To begin
with, playing games
and watching television programs are provided more knowledge based on content. When kids play games
while
they can get Correct word choice
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
cretaive
and innovative ideas and Correct your spelling
creative
this
will help for
their thinking process Change preposition
apply
by
creatively. Change preposition
apply
For example
, an online chess game can increase thinking
process Correct article usage
the thinking
differntly
and immediately Correct your spelling
differently
along with
the opponent how to think and how to attack, this
can lead to get
more skills and talents. Toddlers are able to obtain many good qualities from watching TV programs. Change the verb form
getting
Therefore
, these can give more benefits
.
In contrast
, watching series
and playing games
do not improve the children
mental Change noun form
children's
development
because this
is only an
entertainment and it does not provide any cognitive improvement. Remove the article
apply
For instance
, education based on programmes can rise
the kid's mental Correct your spelling
raise
development
instead
of the
entertainment Correct article usage
apply
such
as science exhibition
and quiz Fix the agreement mistake
exhibitions
competitation
. If a kid Correct your spelling
competition
competitions
watching
Wrong verb form
watches
series
on TV, he only enjoys Correct article usage
a series
about
the movie or Change preposition
apply
series
rather than he does not think about his knowledge development
.
To conclude
, the infants watch series
and play games
can provide more benefits
such
as creative ideas and innovative thinking. Despite
, it does not improve the Correct pronoun usage
Despite this
infants
mental improvement like cognitive Change to a genitive case
infant's
infants'
development
. Therefore
, I partially agree with this
statement. I hope this
drives more benefits
to kids.Submitted by reanudeepan on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that these ideas are logically organized throughout the essay. Your paragraphs seem to lack clear topic sentences.
coherence cohesion
Include a conclusion that summarizes the essay's main points and restates your position. While you have a conclusion, it is not fully developed.
task achievement
Back up your points with specific examples. Present examples that are directly relevant to your arguments to strengthen them.
task achievement
Focus on fully answering the question. Address all parts of the task, and make sure your position is clear and consistent throughout the essay.