Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the government of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves? Economy is depends upon the dwellers because every nations have their own strengths of youngsters. According to my prespective government of poorer nations to look after their citizens. I accord with the latter notion discord.

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To initiate with the most prominent benefit is that youngsters are
pillers
Correct your spelling
pillars

If you don’t want pillers to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

of every country
have
Correct word choice
and have

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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their own talent.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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need to
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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education, infrastructure, and law that
makes
Wrong verb form
make

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb makes. Consider changing it.

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more upgrades in
country
Correct article usage
the country

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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.
Due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

people's lives
more
Add a missing verb
are more

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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comfortable and creating opportunities for students.
Such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as,
Dubai
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

was no source of water and farming
1887
Change preposition
in 1887

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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but now
Dubai
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

has
own
Correct pronoun usage
its own

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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willpower because of authority
changes
Replace the word
changed

The word changes doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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rules and regulations. Authority
starts
Wrong verb form
started

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb starts. Consider changing it.

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investment
Replace the word
investing

The word investment doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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their own lands and
build
Wrong verb form
building

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb build. Consider changing it.

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many opportunities
of
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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citizens and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

constructed
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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modern building and clouds formation which helps to produce rainfall in
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

dubai
Change the capitalization
Dubai

If you don’t want dubai to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

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further
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with the help of petrol
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

dubai
Change the capitalization
Dubai

If you don’t want dubai to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

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has
sell
Wrong verb form
sold

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb sell. Consider changing it.

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and
generate
Wrong verb form
generated

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb generate. Consider changing it.

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more profits
in addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

again it has
invest
Change the verb form
invested

It appears that the verb invest should be in the past participle form. Consider changing it.

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to
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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their own country and form globally talent come and
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

dubai
Change the capitalization
Dubai

If you don’t want dubai to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

show examples
so that
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

dubai
Change the capitalization
Dubai

If you don’t want dubai to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

show examples
become more independent. Substantiating
further
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, Poorer
nations
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

have
lack
Correct article usage
a lack

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of
law
Fix the agreement mistake
laws

It seems that law may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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and supply
chain
Fix the agreement mistake
chains

It seems that chain may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.
Apart from
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Add an article
the

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
government has
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

work
Change the verb form
worked

It appears that the verb work should be in the past participle form. Consider changing it.

show examples
on
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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giving subsitiy, business investment, Education,
job
Correct word choice
and job

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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opportunities
for
Change preposition
so

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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that
Correct determiner usage
the

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

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economy will grow and income will
be increase
Change the verb form
increase

It appears that the form of the verb increase does not work with be in this sentence.

show examples
as well.
Linking Words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase Moreover. Consider adding a comma.

show examples
if poorer
nations
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

import
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

from developed
nations
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

quality and ingredients don't know what chemicals
was
Change the verb form
were

The verb was does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
used to make
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as,
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
Poorer
nations
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

if
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

make
Wrong verb form
is made

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb make. Consider changing it.

show examples
themselves
Change preposition
by themselves

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they know what ingredients are included so it is better for
consuming
Replace the word
consumption

The word consuming doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
by dwellers.
To conclude
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

depending on other countries it's not
work
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
long
Correct article usage
the long

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
term. If poorer
nations
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb are appears to be unnecessary here.

show examples
import
food
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and medicines
that
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is make
Verb problem
creates

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
more debts
on
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
poores
Correct your spelling
poor

If you don’t want poores to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

nation
Fix the agreement mistake
nations

It seems that nation may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
. So,
independent
Replace the word
independence

The word independent doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
is
cardinal
Add an article
a cardinal
the cardinal

The noun phrase cardinal role seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
role in every
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

nations
Change to a singular noun
nation

The singular quantifier every is followed by the plural noun nations. Consider changing the noun to the singular or using a different quantifier.

show examples
.

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introduction conclusion present
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. To improve, ensure that your essay begins with a clear thesis statement that outlines the two views given in the task and ends with a summarising conclusion that restates your position.
logical structure
Your essay's structure requires improvement. Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that ideas are arranged logically throughout the essay. Use transition words to help the reader follow the argument.
supported main points
Support your main points with relevant and detailed examples. Develop the paragraphs further by explaining how the examples relate to the topic and the argument you are making.
complete response
Ensure that your essay fully addresses the task by discussing both sides of the argument presented and giving your own opinion. Be sure to cover all aspects of the prompt in your response.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strive to present your ideas clearly and comprehensively. Avoid vague statements and ensure each paragraph contributes to your overall argument or response to the question.
relevant specific examples
Use specific, relevant examples to support your arguments. These examples should clearly relate to the topic and provide evidence for the points you are making.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealth distribution
  • international aid
  • foreign assistance
  • sovereignty
  • self-reliance
  • global inequality
  • sustainable development
  • capacity building
  • economic growth
  • philanthropy
  • humanitarian aid
  • global citizenship
  • interdependence
  • poverty alleviation
  • social responsibility
What to do next:
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