IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

last month you had a holiday overseas where you had stayed with your friends.they have just send you some photos of your holiday. writa a letter to your friends.in your letter. Thank them for the photos and holidays. Explian why you didn't write earlier. invite them to come and stay with you.

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Hi John and Mattew, I hope
both
Use synonyms
 of you and your families are in the pink of health. I just received the
photograph
Fix the agreement mistake
photographs
show examples
 which
were send
Change the verb form
were sent
show examples
 by you.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the photos remind me
amazing
Add an article
the amazing
show examples
 time I had with
both
Use synonyms
 of you. Especially Snorkelling in Milton
beach
Capitalize word
Beach
show examples
. It was an unforgettable experience spending vacation with
both
Use synonyms
 of you.
However
Linking Words
, after returning from
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 I was preoccupied with office work. I had back-to-back meetings within the week of returning to India.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, there was quarter ending sales
meet
Wrong verb form
meeting
show examples
 organised with
sales
Correct article usage
the sales
show examples
 team where I had to submit my recommendations to them.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I didn’t find time to reply to you. I am requesting
both
Use synonyms
 of you to come to India and visit Indian tourist places like Tajmahal,
red fort
Correct your spelling
Red Fort
show examples
, Ajanta -Ellora caves.
Both
Use synonyms
 of you can stay with me during your holiday period. It will be
pleasure
Add an article
a pleasure
show examples
 to host
both
Use synonyms
 of you. I am sure you will have
great
Change the article
a great
show examples
 time during your stay in India. Awaiting you’re your quick response. All the best Martin

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coherence cohesion
In terms of logical structure, the letter should maintain a clear progression of ideas. The first paragraph successfully introduces the purpose of writing, but subsequent paragraphs could benefit from smoother transitions and better linkage of ideas.
coherence cohesion
For greeting and closing, using 'Hi' may be seen as informal for some examiners. Consider using 'Dear' for a more universally accepted greeting. The closing is polite, which is good.
coherence cohesion
Each paragraph should focus on one main idea. Ensure that when explaining your reasons for not writing earlier, you do so in a dedicated paragraph, separated from the invitation to India.
task achievement
Your letter accomplishes the task of thanking your friends for the photos, explaining your delayed response, and inviting them to visit. To enhance task achievement, provide more detail and development for each task item.
task achievement
The tone of your writing is casual and friendly, fitting the context of writing to friends. To improve, ensure that your language and expressions are consistently appropriate throughout the letter.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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