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Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The chart depicts the proportions of British
students
Use synonyms
 at one particular university in England who were able to speak other languages
in addition
Linking Words
 to English in 2000 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is explicitly observed that the number of
students
Use synonyms
 who spoke another
language
Use synonyms
 increased by the year 2010.
In contrast
Linking Words
 to other categories, like no other
language
Use synonyms
, French only clearly showed a downward trend by the year 2010. It is quite over that, no other
language
Use synonyms
 sort declined slightly by 10% in 2010,
whereas
Linking Words
 the German-only category remained constant both in 2000 and 2010.
However
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 who chose another
language
Use synonyms
 escalated by 10% in 2010. It is crystal clear that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 the French-only segment decreased by 5%,
whereas
Linking Words
 the Spanish-only only increased by 5%
while
Linking Words
 the number of
students
Use synonyms
 who opted for two other languages remained constant at 10% in 2000 and 2010.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words students, language with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportions" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • multilingualism
  • globalisation
  • immigration
  • education policy
  • career prospects
  • cultural understanding
  • distribution
  • percentage
  • increased/decreased
  • significant
  • trends
  • shifts
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