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Writing Samples
Band 5

The chart below shows the percentage of the population in the UK who consumed the recommended daily amount of fruit and vegetables in 2002, 2006 and 2010.

The chart below shows the percentage of the population in the UK who consumed the recommended daily amount of fruit and vegetables in 2002, 2006 and 2010.
The chart bar above illustrates the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
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 of people who eat fruit and vegetables in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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. From the data, we can see that there is no trend regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
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the
consumption
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 of that food from 2002, 2006, and 2010. In general,
women
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 are the
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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 who predominant over the years
stated
Verb problem
apply
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. Compared with
men
Use synonyms
 and children, their
consumption
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 the highest especially in 2006 when the number
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
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it
Change the pronoun
its
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 peak at more than 30% of the population. In 2002, fruit and vegetables
get
Verb problem
had
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 the lowest
consumption
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 regardless the gender,
men
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 (above 20%),
women
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 (almost 25%), and children (only around 10%). Among the years in the data, children consume less than
men
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 and
women
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. In 2006, their
consumption
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up
Add a missing verb
was up
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 above 15%. Meanwhile, in 2010, their percentage
goes
Wrong verb form
went
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 down
under
Change preposition
to under
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 15%.
In addition
Linking Words
,
men
Use synonyms
 get almost 25% of the population, but
women
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 reach more than 25%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, women, men with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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