The charts detail the proportion of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed, employed or further education in 1980, 1990, and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts detail the proportion of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed, employed or further education in 1980, 1990, and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The pie charts depict the percentage of Australian secondary school graduates who were unemployed, employed or
further
education in 3 observed years.
Overall
,
while
the rate of employed
people
increased, the opposite was seen in the unemployed category and
people
who wanted to study
further
. Accounting for
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
50%, the percentage of
people
who pursued higher education was the highest, followed by employment and jobless rates with 40% and 10% respectively.
This
figure dropped sharply by 12% from 1980 to 1990,
then
slightly decreased by 1% over the following 10 years.
Conversely
, a significant increase was seen in the proportion of individuals who had a job over a decade before growing slightly from 1990 to 2000
On the other hand
, in 1980, the ratio of unemployed
people
was the lowest, at 10% , 40% lower than students seeking advanced study.
Although
there was a slight increase in 1990,
this
figure decreased remarkably by 4% in 2000. The
jobless
Correct quantifier usage
number of jobless
show examples
students remained
its
Change preposition
at its
show examples
lowest over
observed
Correct article usage
the observed
show examples
periods.
Submitted by cathyngo1512 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "further".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 83%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.

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