The bar chart shows the percentage of school children learning to play different musical instrument in 2005, 2010 and 2015. (the piano was over 10% in 2005, over 20% in 2010, about 35% in 2015; the guitar was over 10% in 2005, about 18% in 2010, 40% in 2015; the drums was about 5% in 1005, about 4% in 2010, about 10% in 2015; the violin was 10% in 2005, 9% in 2010, 5% in 2015)

The bar chart shows the percentage of school children learning to play different musical instrument in 2005, 2010 and 2015. (the piano was over 10% in 2005, over 20% in 2010, about 35% in 2015; the guitar was over 10% in 2005, about 18% in 2010, 40% in 2015; the drums was about 5% in 1005, about 4% in 2010, about 10% in 2015; the violin was 10% in 2005, 9% in 2010, 5% in 2015)
The bar chart compares the proportions of students learning four different kinds of musical instruments including the
piano
, the guitar,
drums
and the violin every five years from 2005 to 2015.
Overall
, the percentages of school children learning to play the
piano
and the guitar skyrocketed from 2005 to 2015, whilst the figure for students learning the violin slightly increased and that for students learning
drums
even decreased in the given time.
According to
the information shown in the graph, both of the percentages of school kids learning to play the
piano
and the guitar experienced a four times growth during the decade which respectively grew from 11% to 40% and 10% to 41%. At the other end of the spectrum, there were 5% of the school children who learned
drums
in 2005 which was the same situation in 2010. After five years, the figure for pupils who learned
drums
rose two times by 10%. What should be particularly mentioned is that 10% of the pupils learned to play the
piano
in 2005 and the percentage of that reduced to 5% in 2015.
Submitted by s99104032 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words piano, drums with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Instrument proficiency
  • Year-over-year comparison
  • Percentage increase
  • Cultural impact
  • Technological advancements
  • Popularity surge
  • Music education trends
  • Instrument learning preferences
  • Gradual decline
  • Future projections
  • Statistical significance
  • Cultural preferences
  • Educational implications
  • Accessibility of instruments
  • Shifts in popular music genres
  • Adoption rates
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