Some employers want to contact their staff at all times. Does this development have more advantages then disadvantages?
Some employers decide to reach their
employees
at all times. Although
some individuals believe that this
is not a problem, I believe this
development have
more drawbacks Change the verb form
has
then
advantages because most of the Replace the word
than
employees
have decreased productivity
.
Believing that being reachable
at all the time
is not a negative aspects
might lead people to accept Correct the article-noun agreement
aspect
this
fact as normal, so more employees
support this
type of live
. Replace the word
life
Firstly
, most workers do not believe this
is a negative aspect in
their lives, and they answer a phone even when they are at home. Some of them Change preposition
of
offfer
a second line to be more Correct your spelling
offer
reachable
without notice this
might increase their pressure in life. As a result
, they accept this
as a normal way of living. For instance
, in most countries, it is totally normal to ask for two cellphone numbers that
a manager can call them if they need you. If Correct word choice
so that
this
do
not change, Change the verb form
does
this
will be as
a new rule for the Change preposition
apply
rest
of the world. However
, I believe this
is not right because increase
people's Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
responsanbilities
even when they are not at Correct your spelling
responsibilities
work
.
This
development brings more disadvantages then
positive outcomes because Replace the word
than
employees
have decreased productivity
. This
is the result of having so much pressure at work
and at home that they end it
up feeling demotivated, so they slow down as Correct pronoun usage
apply
natural
response Correct article usage
a natural
of
feeling burned out. Change preposition
to
Moreover
, having no time
to rest
, make
workers feel tired and Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
stressful
because they need to Replace the word
stressed
rest
to feel with high level of energy again. However
, this
is sometimes impossible because they are contacted through email, text or by phone, so productivity
has decreased. To illustrate my point, nowadays, people work
more hours but productivity
has declined because they feel tired during the day due of
not having real Change preposition
to
time
to unwind. I believe being reachable
at
all the Change preposition
apply
time
have
more disadvantages, and it t would be much better to not provide Correct subject-verb agreement
has
personal
phone number.
Add an article
a personal
To conclude
, although
it is requested to provide alternative contact at work
, it is much better to decline this
petition because this
might help the employees
to not be reachable
after they finish their work
, and this
is a preferable way of living to be able to rest
and have fun to feel full of energy again.Submitted by cuevas14dic on
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task achievement
You should ensure that each main point in your essay is clearly developed and extended. Introduce each point with a topic sentence and follow it with relevant support and examples.
task achievement
Work on improving the overall structure of your essay. While you have an introduction and a conclusion, they need to be clearer and more effectively summarize your main points. Specific examples should be included to support arguments better.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be more concise and tightly focused on the question. Make sure your introduction sets the stage for the discussion to come, and your conclusion effectively summarizes the points made.
coherence cohesion
You attempted to organize your essay with a logical structure, but there were moments where the argument wasn't as clear as it could be. A more explicit connection between ideas would enhance the flow and understanding of your points.
coherence cohesion
You should work on connecting your ideas more cohesively. Use transitional phrases and make sure each paragraph builds upon the last in a logical manner, ensuring that all your main points are coherent and clearly support your overall argument.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...