The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The pie chart illustrates the
language
proficiencies of
students
in a university in 2000 and 2010. In 2000, about 30% of
students
exclusively utilized
English
.
Similarly
, a comparable number of
students
spoke only French or another
language
. Learning two additional languages or solely mastering German were less popular choices among university
students
. By 2010,
students
proficient exclusively in Spanish became the predominant group on campus.
Proficiency
in another
language
ranked second in prevalence,
while
competence solely in French or German exhibited the lowest percentages. At the beginning of the 21st century, 30% of college attendees were bilingual in Spanish and
English
. The combined percentage of those proficient in another
language
and solely in French accounted for 30%, marking it as the highest among the groups.
Conversely
, 20% of pupils lacked
proficiency
in any
language
other than
English
. A decade later, 35% of
students
had acquired
proficiency
in Spanish, marking it as the most prevalent
language
skill. Conversing in another
language
emerged as the second most prevalent trend on campus, with
proficiency
in discussions held in French, German, and
English
occupying 30% each."
This
revised version aims to maintain clarity
while
avoiding the repetition of words more than twice in close proximity, especially in conveying information about
language
proficiency
among university
students
in 2000 and 2010.
Submitted by binyang212 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words language, students, english, proficiency with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • multilingualism
  • globalisation
  • immigration
  • education policy
  • career prospects
  • cultural understanding
  • distribution
  • percentage
  • increased/decreased
  • significant
  • trends
  • shifts
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