IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Comparison of Energy Production The pie charts show information about energy production in a country in two separate years.

Comparison of Energy Production The pie charts show information about energy production in a country in two separate years.
#comparison #energy #production #show #information #country #two #years
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The charts compare the five
sources
Use synonyms
 of
energy
Use synonyms
 production in a country that took place in 1995 and 2005. Looking from all perspectives, the four
sources
Use synonyms
 of
energy
Use synonyms
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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experienced an increase,
while
Linking Words
 the remaining one experienced a dramatic fall. In 1995, the three major
sources
Use synonyms
 for
production
Add an article
the production
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 of
energy
Use synonyms
 came from coal, gas, and
petro
Correct your spelling
petrol
.
Initially
Linking Words
 registered at 29,8%, coal has remained in the highest position for
Use synonyms
energy
Add an article
an energy
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source
Use synonyms
 in the subsequent 10 years, recorded at 30.93% in 2005.
Conversely
Linking Words
, petro which served as the least
from
Change preposition
of
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 the three major
Use synonyms
source
Change to a plural noun
sources
show examples
 of
energy
Use synonyms
 in 1995 with
percentage
Correct article usage
a percentage
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 recorded at 29.27, experienced a marked decline to 19.55% in 2005. Upon closer examination of the figures, the proportion of
energy
Use synonyms
sources
Use synonyms
 had taken up by the three components, which left the nuclear and other
source
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 a slight number with 6,4% and 4,9%, respectively. Over the next 10 years,
due to
Linking Words
 the reduction of produced
energy
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 from petro, it had caused a substantial rise
of
Change preposition
in
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 percentage to nuclear and
other
Change the wording
another source
other sources
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source
Use synonyms
, registered at 10.10% and 9.10%, respectively.
However
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 significant increase from the other
Use synonyms
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
show examples
 has
shown
Add a missing verb
been shown
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, it still served them as the lowest position in the contribution of
energy
Use synonyms
 production in 2005.
Submitted by chastinervine on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sources, energy, source with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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