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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of people in Uk in 2004

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of people in Uk in 2004
#expenditure #three #categories #age #groups #people #uk
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This
Linking Words
 chart illustrates the citizen's expenditure
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 three categories among different
age
Use synonyms
 groups in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 in 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the chart that the
perentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
parentage
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
entertainment
Correct article usage
the entertainment
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 category among
Correct article usage
the
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 groups of 61
year
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
 to 75
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 was the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 trend during 2004.
According to
Linking Words
 what was
showen
Correct your spelling
shown
 in the chart, the rate of food and drink in 2004
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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slightly
increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 from
age
Use synonyms
 under 30 to
age
Use synonyms
 76
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 and above from 6% to 23 %.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the percentage of
Correct your spelling
spending
soending
Correct your spelling
spending
 in
restaurant
Fix the agreement mistake
restaurants
show examples
 and
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
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in
Change preposition
from
show examples
Use synonyms
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
show examples
 61 to 75
Submitted by almeem on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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