The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The charts illustrate the proportion of demand in five different market sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Overall

, shopping in

travel

Correct article usage

the travel

show examples

sector lost its market dominance and

replaced

Add a missing verb

was replaced

show examples

by films/music, whilst sales

from

Change preposition

show examples

cloths

Correct your spelling

clothes

show examples

also

decreased and online shopping for books increased. Online shopping for travel dominated

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the market in 2003, which decreased to 29% in 2013.

However

, that sector lost its dominance after ten years which replaced by

film

Correct article usage

the film

show examples

/music industry,

rose

Correct pronoun usage

which rose

show examples

their sales dramatically to 33% in 2013 which was

Change preposition

apply

show examples

21% in 2003.

Furthermore

, demand for clothes in 2003 was 24% in total, which saw a notable decrease to 16% in 2013. It can be seen a slight growth in

book

Add an article

the book

show examples

sector, which was 19% in 2003, that reached

Change preposition

apply

show examples

22% after ten years, which increased by just 3% .People shopped more in travel and films/music, both consist of more than half of total sales at 55% in 2003 and increased

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

to 62% in 2013.

Submitted by Praslah on Sun Jan 14 2024

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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.

▼

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

159 words

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The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Foreign language should be part of curriculum of the school. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that schools should invest more money in technology, such as more computers, while others think more money should be spent on teachers. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities. To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?