Some people believe that time spent on televiosion, video and computer games can be beneficial to children. Others believe this has a negative effects on a child. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
in these modern times
children
facing toward
the digital world. Change preposition
apply
however
, there is
advantages and disadvantages Correct subject-verb agreement
are
giving
free Change preposition
to giving
time
for children
spent
Change the verb form
to spend
time
on TV
, video, and computer games
. In this
essay, I will examine both sides and then
explain why I believe how these
equipment Correct determiner usage
this
are
good for Correct subject-verb agreement
is
children's'
development.
Correct your spelling
children's
firstly
, let
Wrong verb form
letting
children
watching
Wrong verb form
watch
TV
can improve their focus and knowledge. for
example, watching Capitalize word
For
National
Correct article usage
the National
geographic
channel and news Capitalize word
Geographic
channel
can improve Fix the agreement mistake
channels
knowledge
of Correct article usage
the knowledge
children
and also
they can pratice
their focus. Correct your spelling
practice
practise
furthermore
, play
educational Wrong verb form
playing
games
on computer
can improve Add an article
the computer
a computer
problem-solving
skills Correct article usage
the problem-solving
for
Change preposition
of
children
. for instance
, children
who play crossword challenge
Fix the agreement mistake
challenges
they
can learn about varied vocabulary which Correct pronoun usage
apply
is
can improve their speaking.
Unnecessary verb
apply
secondly
, there is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
also
disavantages
from Correct your spelling
disadvantages
disadvantageous
those activity
. if Change the determiner
that activity
those activities
children
get addicted on
watching Change preposition
to
TV
or playing video games
, it will reduce their physical activity, exposure to voilence
and inappropriate content, Correct your spelling
violence
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
will
distractions from homework and other responsibilities. Correct your spelling
and
along with
that parents
have big rule
in Fix the agreement mistake
rules
this
situation. the
Capitalize word
The
parents
need set
the Fix the infinitive
to set
rule
for their Fix the agreement mistake
rules
children
. for example
, when the time
watch
Fix the infinitive
to watch
TV
or video games
and when time
for
study or do Change preposition
to
Correct article usage
an assigment
assigment
.
in short, Correct your spelling
assignment
assignments
obviously
Add a comma
obviously,
parents
have an important rules
for Correct the article-noun agreement
an important rule
important rules
these situation
. Change the determiner
this situation
these situations
these situation
can Change the determiner
this situation
these situations
give
Verb problem
have
positif
effects or Correct your spelling
positive
opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite
in depends
how Wrong verb form
depending on
parents
handle and control their children
.Submitted by hafidzaditaf1 on
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coherence cohesion
It is crucial to maintain a clear and coherent structure throughout your essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea with supporting sentences that directly relate to that idea.
coherence cohesion
Use cohesive devices to link your ideas and sentences. This includes a range of conjunctions and discourse markers.
coherence cohesion
Your essay must have a clear introduction and conclusion. The introduction should present the topic and your thesis statement, while the conclusion should summarize the points made and restate your opinion.
task achievement
Make sure you address all parts of the question. Discuss both views presented in the prompt and give your own opinion with a clear position throughout the essay.
task achievement
Develop your ideas fully by explaining and supporting them with examples. Each paragraph should contain one central idea with explanations or examples that help to illustrate your point.
task achievement
Ensure that the examples you provide are specific and directly relevant to the point you are making. They should clearly demonstrate the argument that you wish to convey.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.