Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is no doubt that modern means of communication have reduced the number of time inhabitants take to meet their
friend
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friends
show examples
. From here,
this
has had a negative effect on their social relationship.
However
, there are
also
some
benefit
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benefits
show examples
from many of
Correct article usage
the connection
show examples
connection
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connections
show examples
. I believe that virtual communication will have
positive
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a positive
show examples
impact on social
relationship
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relationships
show examples
.
As we
Correct word choice
We
show examples
are able to keep in touch with our friends who are in another country by messaging and
email
.
In addition
, if we don't have
phone
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a phone
the phone
show examples
to send text massaging
with
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to
show examples
them
as well as
when they have some problem
of
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with
show examples
geographical location. We don’t have any opportunities in order to have a conversation with them until they go back home.
Moreover
, it extremely
facilitate
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facilitates
show examples
individuals who have
a busy schedules
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a busy schedule
busy schedules
show examples
or time
constraint
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constraints
show examples
.
On the other hand
, that
not
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is not
show examples
the reason to people always use
email
or messaging and
forgot
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forget
show examples
a physical meeting.
For instance
, when they go to a cafe with their friends , they only care about their
phone
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phones
show examples
.
Besides
that, they are depending too much on social media is tantamount to
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
a fake
life
. Because,
for example
, when a girl
upload
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uploads
show examples
her picture on Facebook or Instagram,
then
there are lots of
boy
Change to a plural noun
boys
show examples
send
Correct pronoun usage
who send
show examples
a text to her but her don’t know anyone and she even doesn’t meet them in real
life
.That makes humans only connect with everyone by
email
,
messaging
Correct word choice
and messaging
show examples
and don’t want to go outside. In the end, I believe the modern
many
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way
show examples
of communication helps people a lot to connect with their friends or
relative
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relatives
show examples
in
long
Correct article usage
a long
show examples
distance.
Nevertheless
, it
also
makes people rely too much on
email
or messaging and has had a negative effect on their social lives. We still maintain a balance between real
life
and fake
life
on the internet by messaging and
email
.
Submitted by ngovhngoc on

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structure
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Your introduction should clearly present your main argument. Your body paragraphs should each contain one main idea with supporting sentences that are relevant. Finally, your conclusion should summarize the main points without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing paragraph structure by starting with topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph. Follow this with supporting details and examples. Use cohesive devices appropriately to connect ideas within and between paragraphs.
task response
Take care to address the prompt directly throughout the essay. Explicitly state whether you agree or disagree with the statement and provide clear arguments to back up your stance. Include specific examples to illustrate your point of view.
language
Pay attention to your grammar and vocabulary. Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to express your ideas more precisely and fluently.
development
To improve your score, try to develop your ideas more fully by explaining and illustrating them with more detailed examples. Also, make sure that the examples you provide are directly relevant to the question prompt.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • modern forms of communication
  • email
  • messaging
  • reduce
  • amount of time
  • see friends
  • social lives
  • technology
  • communication
  • faster
  • convenient
  • stay in touch
  • connect
  • online
  • social media platforms
  • meet new people
  • face-to-face interactions
  • maintain relationships
  • excessive reliance
  • social isolation
  • digital communication
  • emotional depth
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