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Band 5.5

The chart bellow shows the different level of post-school qualifications in Australia and proportion of men and women who held them in 1999

The chart bellow shows the different level of post-school qualifications in Australia and proportion of men and women who held them in 1999
#bellow #level #post-school #qualifications #australia #proportion #men #women
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The bar chart given
illustraits
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illustrates
 the percentage of
males
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 and
females
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 which skilled
on
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in
show examples
 different levels of qualifications in Australia in 1999.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that, expect undergraduate
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diploma
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diplomas
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 and bachelor's
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degree
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degrees
show examples
males
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 had more
participances
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participation
 in skilled vocational
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diploma
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diplomas
show examples
, postgraduate
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diploma
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diplomas
show examples
, and
masters
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master's
show examples
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degree
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degrees
show examples
 than
females
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. first of all, we observe a significant difference between
man
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men
show examples
 and
woman
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women
show examples
 which was 80
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percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in skilled vocational
diploma
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the pattern of both
of
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apply
show examples
groups was the same
in
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for
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 postgraduate
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diploma
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diplomas
show examples
 and master's
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degree
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degrees
show examples
 which
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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was 70 and 60 for
males
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 and 30 and 40 for
females
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, we see the most popular
degree
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 among
famales
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females
families
 which was
undergraduate
Correct article usage
an undergraduate
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diploma
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 and was 70.
Linking Words
Also
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Also,
show examples
males
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 dedicated just about 35
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percent
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per cent
show examples
in
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to
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this
Linking Words
degree
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.
Additionally
Linking Words
, bachelor's
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degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
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allocated
Add a missing verb
are allocated
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50
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to 50
show examples
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percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
females
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 and 45
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percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
males
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.
Submitted by arefehbks on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words males, females, diploma, degree, percent with synonyms.
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