Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Students want to learn additional
subjects
in addition
to the main subject at some universities.
On the other hand
, I believe that there is a need for more involvement in the main subject for a good qualification. In
this
essay, we will discuss both of these views, and I will try to explain my point of view. The first point of view is that additional
subjects
are required for students' mental development, and they would be essential for every learner
due to
the competition era. Without an extra curriculum, they cannot showcase their inner talent. They will foster their inner talent when they understand their inner talent.
This
success will come in a very short
time
.
For example
, for school going students are studying
text book
Correct your spelling
textbook
show examples
with some scientific and
arts
Change the noun form
art
show examples
type of staffs
then
they will better which subject they have
interest
Correct article usage
an interest
show examples
and
Change preposition
in and
show examples
in future they will be master on favourite.
On the other hand
, some people believe that the extra
subjects
are a kind of burden for those involved in studying. Because of if they give their afford to the extra topic
then
time
will be
waste
Wrong verb form
wasted
show examples
for them in main
subjects
. Right now job seekers are taking skillful and expert for the
require
Change the verb form
required
show examples
post. For that reason, if they are
involving
Wrong verb form
involved
show examples
in multitasking
then
it will be very true they cannot give us quality feedback.
For
Change preposition
Instead
show examples
instead
, if a space engineer week in football
playing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
then
they cannot touch
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both expertise or they will be
expert
Fix the agreement mistake
experts
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
one side.
To sum up
, multitasking is a kind of tool for average people
however
if
any one
Correct your spelling
anyone
show examples
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
to become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
skilful
then
need
concentration
Replace the word
concentrate
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
one point
then
it
possible
Add a missing verb
is possible
show examples
.
Moreover
, my observation quality is
an
Change the article
apply
show examples
essential for
long
Correct your spelling
long-term
show examples
time
success. So do not waste
time
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
extra curriculum.
Submitted by nuresadikchowdhury175 on

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Task Achievement
To enhance Task Achievement: Strive to fully address the prompt by exploring both views in-depth before offering your own opinion. Ensure your personal stance is clearly stated and well-supported with reasoned arguments and specific examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve Coherence and Cohesion: Focus on organizing your essay more logically by ensuring each paragraph deals with a single main idea. Use a range of cohesive devices accurately but beware of overuse. Improve paragraphing by clearly separating your ideas into distinct sections.
Development
Work on developing your ideas more completely, providing detailed explanations and concrete examples to support your points. This will help make your arguments more persuasive and engaging to the reader.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
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