Nowadays, many families move overseas for job opportunities. Some people think this is beneficial for the children of these families, while other think children will find it difficult. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Abroad
countries
are attracting more people
theseadays
Correct your spelling
these days
than ever before as places like
such
provide various
opportunities
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
immigrants
Change the noun form
immigrant
show examples
families to start new businesses.
Therefore
, it is said by some that
this
migration will benefit the
youngones
Correct your spelling
young ones
,
however
, other
suggests
Change the verb form
suggest
show examples
that
children
have to face problems. In
this
essay, both sides will be discussed
along with
my opinion.
To begin
with, it is found that
youngones
Correct your spelling
young ones
, living alone
seperate
Correct your spelling
separate
separated
from parents, tend to have
home sickness
Correct your spelling
homesickness
show examples
, which
result
Change the verb form
results
show examples
in poor academic performance, lack of focus and
guidence
Correct your spelling
guidance
.
However
, if family support is provided to
youngones
Correct your spelling
young ones
, these
primarily
Change the adverb
primary
show examples
issues can be resolved by listening to the problem
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and providing
guidence
Correct your spelling
guidance
to make the best choices.
Moreover
,
children
will have
opportunities
to get
education
Correct article usage
an education
show examples
from great universities in developed
countries
rather than in less developed nations as
countries
like Germany, provide education at no cost for the youth.
Hence
, it would be beneficial for
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
show examples
to live
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
overseas.
On the other hand
, inviting parents to live with, it raise the
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
pressure on the
children
. The
youngones
Correct your spelling
young ones
have to spend money on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
travel, living, groceries, and many more, resulting in more
expanses
Correct your spelling
expenses
show examples
than
earning
Correct your spelling
earnings
show examples
.
For instance
, a
rececnt
Correct your spelling
recent
study, done by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
CNN
news
Capitalize word
News
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
shows that
chidren
Correct your spelling
children
are more likely to face economic
crisis
Fix the agreement mistake
crises
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
while
living with families than living by
ownself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
.
In addition
, sometimes it may get hard for both parents and
children
to adapt new culture
as
Change preposition
because
show examples
of
language
Correct article usage
the language
show examples
barrier. It is hard for
youngones
Correct your spelling
young ones
to leave all behind and start from the bottom line.
Therefore
,
children
would have
Add an article
a problem
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
,
while
migratiing
Correct your spelling
migrating
to
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
. In conclusion,
although
moving to developed
countries
has both advantages and disadvantages, I think, it opens
a great
Correct the article-noun agreement
great opportunities
a great opportunity
show examples
opportunities
for the youth to build their career. There are many amenities are provided for the development of the youth.
Thus
, the
youngones
Correct your spelling
young ones
should not miss
opportunities
like
this
, if they are concerned about the upcoming future.
Submitted by yudhveer4890 on

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task achievement
Ensure a balanced discussion of both views before stating your opinion. Provide equal development to both sides of the argument to fully address the task.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical structure by organizing ideas more effectively. Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to indicate what the paragraph will be about and ensure the paragraph stays focused on that main idea.
task achievement
To improve task response, the essay should include more specific examples to support claims. This includes citing studies, giving hypothetical scenarios, or providing personal anecdotes that are directly relevant to the points made.
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