The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, The United Kingdom and Japan in the year 2009

The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, The United Kingdom and Japan in the year 2009
The bar chart illustrates data about the percentage of consumption for five different categories with regard to 4 different countries, which are the United States,
Canada
, The United
Kingdom
and
Japan
in 2009.
Overall
,
it is clear that
housing merchants and services contain the highest proportion in 4 countries.
In contrast
, Clothing and healthcare accounted for the lowest share among the five sectors. As regards
3
Correct article usage
the 3
show examples
highest expenditures, the United States spent over one-fifth of its total spending on accommodations , followed by 24% in the United
Kingdom
, 22% in
Japan
and 20% in
Canada
.
In addition
,
Japan
and the United
Kingdom
occupied the highest rates in
food
Add an article
the food
show examples
section, 23% and 21% respectively. In terms of transport,
Canada
consumed the most, for one-fifth,
while
Japan
only accounted for one in ten. Turning to the remaining data, medical expenses made up 8% in the United States, contrary to the United
Kingdom
with a mere 2% in total,
Japan
and
Canada
took the same place, which was 4%. What’s more, Canadians spent more than 5% on clothing products, followed by a range from 4% to 5% in other regions.
Submitted by nguyetcat.dao on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words canada, kingdom, japan with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: