The chart below shows what Anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course. The table shows the salaries of the anthropologists in work after five years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

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The pie chart displays what one university's graduating Anthropology students went on to do after

completenig

Correct your spelling

completing

their undergraduate degree,

while

Linking Words

the table illustrates how much those students earned after 5 years.

Overall

Linking Words

, the majority of graduates went on the full-time jobs and those who did government work had the highest salary. Just over a half of graduates went on the full-time jobs, compared with only 15% of students, who chose a part-time job and 12% of unemployed individuals.

However

Linking Words

, some graduates choose part-time or full-time postgrad study at 5% and 8%, respectively. After 5 years, freelance consultants and government sector employees had an equal

percentages

Correct the article-noun agreement

percentage

show examples

, which is 80% of workers, who earned more than $75,000,

while

Linking Words

those, who worked in the private sector were only 55% with that salary.

In addition

Linking Words

, the proportion of employees in the two smallest categories is equal in the first two types of employment,

however

Linking Words

, the private companies' workers had double the percentage, compared with the previous two types.

Submitted by katiakardash07 on Sat Feb 03 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, while".

▼

Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

164 words

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