IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

People today don't make good use of their time and spend too much time watching TV and playing video games instead of participating in more productive activities. Do you agree or disagree?

2.0 / 9
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Introduction
Modern individuals tend to
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
 time
whatching
Correct your spelling
watching
 TV and
scrooling
Correct your spelling
scrolling
 social
media
Use synonyms
, rather
to be
Change preposition
than being
show examples
 active person. I
am totally agree
Change the verb form
totally agree
show examples
 with
this
Linking Words
 statement,
Correct article usage
the improvment
show examples
improvment
Correct your spelling
improvement
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
 and full of computer
gimes
Correct your spelling
games
 on the internet
attract
Correct subject-verb agreement
attracts
show examples
people
Use synonyms
be
Fix the infinitive
to be
show examples
 active and take
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
part
some
Change preposition
in some
show examples
 sports
club
Fix the agreement mistake
clubs
show examples
.
Body paragraph 1
Firstly
Linking Words
,
socail
Correct your spelling
social
media
Use synonyms
 have
crucial
Correct article usage
a crucial
show examples
 influence
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
people
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
partucular
Correct your spelling
particularly
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
young
people
Use synonyms
.
Defenitely
Correct your spelling
Definitely
 short
vidios
Correct your spelling
videos
 and funny content make to be addictive person.
Consiquiently
Correct your spelling
Consequently
people
Use synonyms
 forget about time management and can
spent
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
 a lot of time
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
.
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
filmakers
Correct your spelling
filmmakers
 and
creaters
Correct your spelling
creators
 make money selling
this
Linking Words
 content for us,
this
Linking Words
why
Add a missing verb
is why
show examples
 they will do
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
their best to attract us from
another task
Fix the agreement mistake
other tasks
show examples
 like
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
.
Body paragraph 2
Secondly
Linking Words
, I strongly believe that modern children even
adult
Fix the agreement mistake
adults
show examples
people
Use synonyms
prefer
Add the particle
prefer to
show examples
 play a
gime
Correct your spelling
game
 on
computer
Add an article
a computer
the computer
show examples
 rather
in
Correct word choice
than in
show examples
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
. Because it
is
Verb problem
does
show examples
 not
required
Wrong verb form
require
show examples
 a lot of energy and
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
games
Use synonyms
 can give true emotion.
In addition
Linking Words
Body paragraph 3
nowadays
games
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 very interesting and
list
Correct article usage
the list
show examples
 of
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
games
Use synonyms
various
Replace the word
varies
show examples
. Everyone can find
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
fevourite
Correct your spelling
favourite
 game and play
none stop
Verb problem
nonstop
show examples
.
Conclusion
In
conclucion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, in the
fulled
Replace the word
full
show examples
 world with social
media
Use synonyms
 and computer
Use synonyms
games
Add a comma
games,
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 can easily forget about really
nececcery
Correct your spelling
necessary
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
show examples
 and
other king
Change the wording
another king
other kings
show examples
 of
activation
Replace the word
activities
show examples
.

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introduction
Ensure that your introduction sets a clear statement about your position regarding the statement. Avoid vague sentences and get straight to the point about whether you agree or disagree with the statement.
logical structure
Develop fully formed paragraphs with a clear topic sentence, supporting sentences, and a concluding sentence. This will help in creating a more logical structure in your essay.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and synonyms to avoid repetition, which will enhance the linguistic variety in your essay.
supported main points
Ensure that the main body paragraphs contain specific examples to support your points. Use real-life examples, statistics, facts, or hypothetical situations to substantiate your arguments.
grammatical range and accuracy
Mind your spelling, punctuation, and grammar. Always proofread your essay to correct any mistakes that can hinder the clarity of your message.
conclusion
Create a conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your initial position clearly. The conclusion should feel like a closure to the entire argument presented in the essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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