Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#university #students #subjects #addition #time #attention #qualification

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Certain undergraduate students attempt to gain diverse knowledge on multiple streams

while

Linking Words

the rest believe specialization in

one

Use synonyms

aspect makes them more qualified. In my opinion, studying hard in

one

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field can lead to

job

Use synonyms

insecurity, and working more than

one

Use synonyms

stream would produce more work opportunities and create more entrepreneurship.

Therefore

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, in my conviction, quallifcating different subjects would make a better future for students. To commence with, cramming on a single speciality would make people more frustrated in searching for

job

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opportunities because if the

job

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market is already saturated in that field or if it's

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show examples

outdated subject to the modern

job

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market person may

rejected

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reject

be rejected

show examples

leading to

mentalliy

Correct your spelling

mentally

unstabalizing

Correct your spelling

stabilizing

destabilizing

the individual.

For example

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according to

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

research done by

University

Correct article usage

the University

show examples

of Peradeniya Science Faculty student group, around 60 Art graduates, who specialized in

one

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subject attempted suicide between the years 2000-2010 with death rates of 2 per year.

Hence

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, I strongly believe career insecurity is a huge problem when specialising in a specific field.

On the other hand

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multifield

Add an article

the multifield

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ability would lead a person into a bigger arena of the

job

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market ,and it opened the doors of

enterpreneurship

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entrepreneurship

. Most private sector employers seek employees with multitasking abilities with vast expertise

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different

discplines

Correct your spelling

disciplines

, and other than that if somebody wants to be good at business

that

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apply

show examples

he must

have to

Verb problem

apply

show examples

have spread his business in different fields to withstand failure in

one

Use synonyms

aspect.

For instance

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, Elon Musk used his success in his electric car company for the failures in his Space X company.

Hence

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, again I strongly argue that long-spread insight is the key to success in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

life. In conclusion, gathering education

Change preposition

apply

show examples

concern

Fix the agreement mistake

concerns

show examples

with a specific area would lead to place individuals in

uncertarnity

Correct your spelling

uncertainty

and frustration , and

wide spread

Correct your spelling

widespread

show examples

knowledge gathering in undergraduate life would create a successful carrier for the most individual.

Hence

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this

Linking Words

writer

is in

Verb problem

apply

show examples

strongly

believe

Correct subject-verb agreement

believes

show examples

that university students want to learn about

other

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

subjects, other than their main subject.

Submitted by dinaka0001 on Fri Feb 09 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

Ensure a clear logical structure throughout the essay. Use transitional phrases to smoothly move from one point to the next, ensuring that the logical flow of the essay is maintained.

Coherence & Cohesion

Include both an introduction and conclusion. These should effectively introduce the topic and summarize the main points, respectively. The conclusion in particular should clearly reflect your opinion.

Coherence & Cohesion

Support main points with clear examples, facts, or reasons. While broad statements contribute to the discussion, concrete examples make your arguments more convincing and are necessary for a higher score.

Task Achievement

Ensure you respond completely to the task, including all parts of the prompt in your discussion. Your response should be balanced, discussing both views before presenting your own opinion.

Task Achievement

Develop clear and comprehensive ideas for each position before expressing your own viewpoint. This strengthens the task response by demonstrating a thorough understanding of the perspectives.

Task Achievement

Use relevant and specific examples to support each point. Your essay included a pertinent example, but incorporating more would strengthen its persuasiveness and provide a more comprehensive argument.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

331 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Broaden
Perspectives
Specialize
Critical thinking
Problem-solving skills
Career success
Interdisciplinary connections
Structured path
Clear goals
Creativity
Innovation
Academic credibility
Recognition
Balance
Exploring

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Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative situation?

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and polution probloms. To what extend do you agree or disagree? What other measures might be effictive ?

Some people believe that governments should pay full course fees for students who want to study in universities. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?