IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #ten #countries #production #consumption #electricity #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar graph compares the amount of
electricity
Use synonyms
 in
Use synonyms
Kwh
Correct your spelling
kWh
 that the top ten countries produced and consumed in 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, what stands out from the graph is that China and The United States are by far the largest and
second largest
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second-largest
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electricity
Use synonyms
 producers and users
respectivey
Correct your spelling
respectively
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Germany and Korea.Rep. were the only two countries studied
where
Correct word choice
that
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 used
electricity
Use synonyms
 more
that
Correct word choice
than
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 they produced. As can be seen with regards to
electricity
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 production, China generated 5398
billion
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kWh
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, the highest quantity,
while
Linking Words
 the US ranked second with 4099
billion
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. These figures were significantly greater than those of
remaining
Correct article usage
the remaining
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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, with Russia in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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third place, recording 1057
billion
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kWh
Use synonyms
, and
Add an article
the republic
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republic
Capitalize word
Republic
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 of
korea
Change the capitalization
Korea
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 in tenth generating 485.1
billion
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. Turning to
comsumption
Correct your spelling
consumption
,
although
Linking Words
 the US produced 4.099
billion
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kWh
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, making it
a
Correct article usage
the
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 country with the biggest surplus. The second largest surplus was in India, where consumption was 698.8
billion
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kWh
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, 172
billion
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 lower than production. China, which used 5322
billion
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kWh
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, had the
greates
Correct your spelling
greatest
 consumption rate,
whereas
Linking Words
 Brazil had the lowest with 499
billion
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by shamim1999 on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, kwh, billion with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • disparity
  • significant
  • top ten countries
  • main features
  • compare
  • relevant
  • geographical concentration
  • trends
  • patterns
  • implications
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