Should companies ensure that they employ a quota (or fixed percentage) of women in all jobs, or is this an impractical concept? Discuss both sides of this debate, and reach a conclusion based on your own opinion.

Employing
a
Change the article
an
show examples
allotment of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
has become a debate among businesses. It is argued whether the idea is a realistic one or an unachievable idea. I fully agree that organizations need to set
a
Change the article
an
show examples
allotment for
women
in all occupations. There are some potential advantages when applying
a
Change the article
an
show examples
allotment in one company.
For example
, mandatory quotas can ensure diversity.
Due to
this
, there will be better innovations because
women
can bring other perspectives and a range of
talent
Fix the agreement mistake
talents
show examples
.
Moreover
, quotas can encourage
women
to pursue careers in fields where they are underrepresented. It can help
women
against unconscious bias so that they will get fairer opportunities in hiring. From the economic side, research indicates that enterprises with greater gender diversity have higher profitability and return on equity.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
there are a lot of positive impacts, one policy will always have the other edge of the sword. Some folks argue
this
could potentially lead to less competent workers being appointed and tokenism risk where
women
are chosen to fill the allocation but lack competencies and skills.
Although
these are valid concerns, these problems can be tackled by the company to actively seek out and nurture qualified female talent that might have been overlooked previously.
Thus
, I believe that the positive advantages of setting up a quota are more significant in society than the potential drawbacks.
To conclude
, implementing quotas puts industries and society at an advantage. I,
therefore
, agree that corporations should set up their quota policies,
thus
giving
women
an equal chance in the workforce
Submitted by meilyfransiska on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction Clarity
Make sure to present a clear introduction that clearly outlines the points that you will discuss. The introduction should provide a brief overview of the topic and your stance.
Detail and Example Enhancement
Develop your main points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples. While you have touched on several advantages and disadvantages, expanding on these with more concrete details would strengthen your argument.
Structural Coherence
Work on your essay's structure to enhance its logical flow. This includes organizing your paragraphs effectively, with a clear topic sentence for each paragraph followed by supporting information.
Effective Conclusion
Conclude your essay by summarizing your main points and restating your opinion clearly. This helps to reinforce your argument and provides a clear ending to your discussion.
Grammar and Spelling
Be cautious of grammar and spelling errors. While these are not heavily detracting from your overall message, addressing these will polish your essay and make it more professional.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • quota
  • diversity
  • historical imbalances
  • meritocracy
  • underrepresented
  • gender inequality
  • tokenism
  • administrative challenge
  • nuanced policies
  • rigid
  • complement
  • disparity
  • implementation
  • context
What to do next:
Look at other essays: