IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

the first chart below shows how energy is used in an average australian house hold. the second chart shows the greenhouse gas emission which result from thier energy use.summarise the info by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

the first chart below shows how energy is used in an average australian house hold. the second chart shows the greenhouse gas emission which result from thier energy use.summarise the info by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The Pie charts illustrate the consumption of power in houses in Australia and the greenhouse
gas
Use synonyms
 which is released
as a result
Linking Words
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
energy
Use synonyms
 usage.
Overall
Linking Words
,most of the
energy
Use synonyms
 is required for heating and water heating purposes but the emission of
green house
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
show examples
 gases is not
propotionate
Correct your spelling
proportionate
 the
energy
Use synonyms
 usage as more
gas
Use synonyms
 is released by water heating and usage of other appliances. Warming takes up about 42% of the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
total
energy
Use synonyms
 but only 15%
Use synonyms
gas
Change preposition
of gas
show examples
 is produced because of it,
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add the comma(s)
hand,
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eventhough
Correct your spelling
even though
 other household
appliance
Fix the agreement mistake
appliances
show examples
 consume 15% of the total power it is responsible for 28% of the pollution. Water heating requires 30% of the
energy
Use synonyms
 and produces almost equal quantity of
gas
Use synonyms
.
Refrigiration
Correct your spelling
Refrigeration
, lighting and cooling only
demands
Correct subject-verb agreement
demand
show examples
 only less than 10% of the total
energy
Use synonyms
.
Refrigiration
Correct your spelling
Refrigeration
 produces 14% of the total
gas
Use synonyms
 which is almost equal to that produced by heating.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words gas, energy with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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