IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

You are due to move into a rented apartment next week but you will not be able to due to an unexpected problem. Write a letter to the property manager. In your letter 1) Explain the situation 2) Describe your problems 3) Tell him/her when you think you can move in Write at least 150 words. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Ms. Williams

#move #apartment #week #property #manager #situation #ms #williams
Dear Ms. Williams, I am writing to let you know that I
am suppose
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am supposed
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 to move into
rented
Correct article usage
a rented
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appartment
Correct your spelling
apartment
 next
week
 .Unfortunately , it will get
delay
Wrong verb form
delayed
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 by one
week
 because my
husband
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husband's
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car
 accident
happen
Wrong verb form
happened
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 yesterday ,so , we need to address
to
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apply
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the police to complete
financial
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the financial
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 documents . I hope you will understand my
sitatution
Correct your spelling
situation
. Let me explain here , My husband was coming from work
on
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at
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regualar
Correct your spelling
regular
 time
on
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in
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 his
car
 .Suddenly ,
truck
Add an article
a truck
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 coming from another side
block
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blocked
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view
Correct article usage
the view
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 of
car
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the car
a car
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 behind it which hit our
car
 . We are lucky that he is
Rephrase
all alright
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alright
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right
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 in
this
 situation but need to
conatct
Correct your spelling
contact
 with
car
 company about insurance and
also
 deal with the claim we
needed it
Wrong verb form
need
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.
Therefore
 , due
this
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to this
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 problem we are overdue and
i
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I
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 hope it will solve
with
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in
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 that
week
 . Would you please let us
to
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apply
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stay here for another
week
 so we finish all the formalities with
this
 apartment and move freely before moving to another
loaction
Correct your spelling
location
.
Change the punctuation
?
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 I would really appreciate
if
Correct pronoun usage
it if
show examples
 you help us in our difficult
sitatution
Correct your spelling
situation
. Thank you for your consideration, Yours faithfully, Roop
Submitted by kmlchahal97 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure correct and full adherence to the task by addressing all aspects in a more detailed manner. Expand on the description of the issues you're facing, and provide a clear, specific proposed new move-in date.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve your score, try to enhance the logical flow of your ideas. Use linking words and phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs smoothly. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single idea or aspect of the situation for greater clarity.
Task Achievement
Maintain a formal and polite tone throughout your letter. Use full sentences, avoid contractions (e.g., 'I am' instead of 'I'm'), and double-check your writing for any typographical or grammatical errors.
Coherence & Cohesion
Make use of paragraphs to structure your letter effectively, ensuring there's a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. This will help the reader follow your arguments and requests more easily.
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