IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011.

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011.
#percentage #households #accommodation #england #wales
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The bar chart illustrates the
households
Use synonyms
 owning and renting accommodation in England and
Wale
Fix the agreement mistake
Wales
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 from 1918 to 2011 with instruments in percentages.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 1918,
households
Use synonyms
 in rented accommodation
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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started at 78 % but slowly decreased to 68 % in 1939 but a small rise
on
Change preposition
in
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 the next 14 years with 69% before
dropped
Change the form of the verb
dropping
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 to 59% in 1961.In
contast
Correct your spelling
contrast
,
households
Use synonyms
 in owned accommodation started at only 22% and
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
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increased steadily to 32% before
hit
Wrong verb form
hitting
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 40% in 1961.As seen from the chart,both accommodations have the same figures at 50 % in 1971.Next,
households
Use synonyms
 in owned gradually to rise until
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
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to
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 peak point in 2011 with 64% but it appears that
households
Use synonyms
 in rented
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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continued to drop and
finally
Linking Words
 ended at 35% .
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 people in England and
Wale
Fix the agreement mistake
Wales
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are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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preferd
Correct your spelling
prefer
 to own a house rather than rent.
Submitted by tifjong on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words households with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • tenancy
  • trend
  • fluctuation
  • proportion
  • residence
  • dwelling
  • shift
  • transition
  • migration
  • fluctuate
  • stabilize
  • rise
  • fall
  • increase
  • decrease
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