Because some children do not seem to have natural ability to learn other languages, schools should not force them to learn foreign languages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
contemporary era, learning foreign
languages
Use synonyms
is become
Change to the active voice
becomes
has become
show examples
trendy and academic sectors and parents are frantically wanting their
children
Use synonyms
to study certain
languages
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, it
is argue
Change the verb form
is argued
show examples
that some pupils
are have
Change the verb form
have
show examples
no talent
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
learning
extran
Correct your spelling
extra
languages
Use synonyms
curriculum because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
brain memory limitation. And, if students
are not offer
Change the verb form
are not offered
are not offering
show examples
to learn
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
should not give them pressure to learn it. In my point of view
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
statement
due to
Linking Words
language is the key to
open
Wrong verb form
opening
show examples
the world. To being with, In
this
Linking Words
modernized society
English
Use synonyms
language
is play
Change the verb form
plays
show examples
a vital role and the people who master in certain foreign
languare
Correct your spelling
language
will
be
Verb problem
find it
show examples
easy to get
Use synonyms
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
and enroll
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
reputative univistry
such
Linking Words
as Yelu or UCLA.
Thus
Linking Words
, for
children
Use synonyms
's flashiness
future
Use synonyms
guardian
Fix the agreement mistake
guardians
show examples
and schooling should force
children
Use synonyms
to attend the lesson which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
can
insurance
Replace the word
insure
show examples
their
future
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
academically and socially.
For example
Linking Words
, the majority of highest quality
acadamic
Correct your spelling
academic
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
are in the United
State
Fix the agreement mistake
States
show examples
such
Linking Words
as Harvard University and New York University. If student
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
learn
English
Use synonyms
they
Correct word choice
as they
show examples
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
a child
then
Linking Words
will be regert when their priorities
changed
Replace the word
change
show examples
because of
the
Change the word
their
show examples
lack of
English
Use synonyms
skills they could be get reject
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
their dream school.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
children
Use synonyms
's
guardian
Fix the agreement mistake
guardians
show examples
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
have to take
a responsibilities
Correct the article-noun agreement
a responsibility
responsibilities
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
scheming for their
kid
Change noun form
kid's
show examples
future
Use synonyms
developmment
Correct your spelling
development
and
survive
Replace the word
survival
show examples
in the
cural
Correct your spelling
civil
society. Because
spoilment
Correct your spelling
spoiling
can lead them to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
worse situation.
Due
Linking Words
to
Correct pronoun usage
to this
show examples
, the majority of
decent
Add an article
the decent
a decent
show examples
Use synonyms
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
are
seciously
Correct your spelling
seriously
concerned about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
English
Use synonyms
skills and extra foreign
languages
Use synonyms
skills. Since
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
nowaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
show examples
buscinesses
Correct your spelling
businesses
tend to be
gobalized
Correct your spelling
globalized
so if your can master
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
certain
languages
Use synonyms
or
English
Use synonyms
you can have
job
Use synonyms
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to the
pople
Correct your spelling
people
who have no foreign
languange
Correct your spelling
language
ability.
Consequently
Linking Words
, some
acedamic instituation
Correct your spelling
academic institutions
have to
pursuade
Correct your spelling
persuade
their pupils and
impose
Verb problem
force
show examples
them to learn
foreigh
Correct your spelling
foreign
and
proficiency
Replace the word
proficient
show examples
in
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. In conclusion, learning extra
languages
Use synonyms
is nothing drawback so to be successful in adult life students have to study foreign
languages
Use synonyms
early as
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
as possible. And school and parents
also
Linking Words
have to force
children
Use synonyms
to
learning
Change the verb form
learn
show examples
languages
Use synonyms
curriculum to achieve their dream university and
job
Use synonyms
in the
future
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by haixiuxiaonini on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly presents your opinion on the topic, which is somewhat evident but could be more explicitly stated for clarity. Use a clear thesis statement.
task achievement
Develop your main points with clear, well-elaborated examples. Your essay mentions examples but they need to be more specific and relevant to strongly support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a single main idea. Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to foreground the main idea contained therein.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by ensuring each paragraph flows smoothly into the next with the use of cohesive devices (e.g., however, furthermore, consequently).
general
Be mindful of grammar and spelling errors which can undermine the clarity of your ideas and distract from your arguments.
general
Expand your vocabulary to avoid repetition of words and phrases, enhancing the sophistication of your writing.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: