IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

You ordred an item from an online store and it has arrived damaged. Write a letter to the retailer to complain. In the letter: -Explain why you are unhappy -Request a refund -Make arrangements to return the damaged item

#item #store #retailer #-explain #-request #refund #-make #arrangements
Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to you to explain the letter that
last
 week, I bought
phone
Add an article
the phone
a phone
show examples
 from
a
Change the article
an
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 online store so I
was prefer
Change the verb form
preferred
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than
Correct your spelling
the
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ones that day, but it
is
Verb problem
did
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 not meet the demand since it has arrived ruined. After
bring
Correct your spelling
being
show examples
 from
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 online store. I
am
Unnecessary verb
apply
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checked
to
Change preposition
apply
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it, and it is colour bad so I am not
ask
Wrong verb form
asking for
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 colour. It is not
good
Correct article usage
a good
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 work intro system. So
that
Correct word choice
apply
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I am upset. I request that refund my money.In
additionally
Replace the word
addition
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, your treatment of a customer
are
Change the verb form
is
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 not meet the demand and it
is arrived
Change to the active voice
arrives
has arrived
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 two hours late.
As well as
Rephrase
Also
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this
 service is not good. So
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
I request are refund
my
Change preposition
of my
show examples
 money. So I request that
instead
 it
what
Add a missing verb
be what
show examples
 I am going to change other ones.
However
, you must
be bring
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
this
 time. If to be
this
 event I am glad. Yours faithfully, Sadinova Feruza
Submitted by soglomovsarvar on

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logical structure
Ensure the letter has a clear structure: Begin with a brief introduction, followed by a paragraph detailing the issue, another paragraph outlining your requests, and a polite closing statement.
single idea per paragraph
Maintain a single focus in each paragraph. The first could explain the problem, the second could detail your request for a refund, and the third could address returning the item.
greeting and closing
Use appropriate greetings and closing remarks. 'Dear Sir or Madam,' is correct, but ensure the closing is consistent, such as 'Yours sincerely,' followed by your name if the name of the recipient is unknown.
complete response
Provide a clear explanation of the issue, including specifics about the damage and how it impacts the product's use. This helps in making your request for a refund and return more justified.
suitable writing tone
The tone of the letter should be formal yet polite. Avoid informal language or expressions. Instead, use formal phrases and requests to make your points clearly and respectfully.

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