These days, school should focus more on producing young people who have the skills required to join the workforce, rather than focusing on academic subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

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It is widely accepted nowadays that

proffessions

Correct your spelling

professionals

need manpower who is

skillful

Change the spelling

skilful

show examples

. In

this

Linking Words

regard

Add a comma

regard,

show examples

some believe that education should be based on these kinds of skills to introduce them to the actual job market rather than concentrating just on written and non-practical courses.

This

Linking Words

essay will argue

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

how significantly it is important to have

talented

Correct article usage

a talented

show examples

and skilled workforce rather than

educated

Correct article usage

an educated

show examples

only. There are some

belifes

Correct your spelling

beliefs

point

Correct pronoun usage

that point

show examples

to the academic training of the students in schools and overwatch the importance of being skilled. these people justify that if there is no scientific

trainings

Change the wording

training

pieces of training

show examples

there will not be capabilities

derive

Wrong verb form

derived

show examples

from it.

For instance

Linking Words

, people who did not pursue university training are not able to participate in scientific disputes and seminars. They

also

Linking Words

believe if governments recruit only skilled people but

illiterate

Correct pronoun usage

illiterate ones

show examples

, the rate of innovation will fall down, as they mention that to be creative and innovative one needs to be academically educated. In a nutshell, they assume having

some

Correct determiner usage

show examples

university

degrees

Fix the agreement mistake

degree

show examples

will be beneficial. There

are

Change the verb form

show examples

also

Linking Words

other point

Change the wording

another point

other points

show examples

of view which

indicates

Correct subject-verb agreement

indicate

show examples

that what runs the economic

engins

Correct your spelling

engines

engine

are

Change the verb form

show examples

skillful

Change the spelling

skilful

show examples

workforce and schools should meticulously focus on the outcome which is

ability

Add an article

the ability

show examples

to perform well. They assume academic degree can not meet the

expectation

Fix the agreement mistake

expectations

show examples

of the job market and

employers

Correct word choice

that employers

show examples

are

Verb problem

show examples

not

intended

Wrong verb form

intend

show examples

to hire

those

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

unskilled

graduated

Replace the word

graduates

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, they mention that if you utilize employees with insufficient skills but

academically

Add a missing verb

are academically

show examples

capable, they will not provide positive

result

Fix the agreement mistake

results

show examples

for the company.

Linking Words

Also

Add a comma

Also,

show examples

they think employing unskilled employees will decrease the productivity in firms which brings about discontentment and

lower

Add an article

a lower

show examples

rate of income or at least

declining

Correct article usage

a declining

show examples

rate for the firm.

To sum up

Linking Words

, it is

nothworthy

Correct your spelling

noteworthy

to mention that not only skill and academic knowledge are highly important in companies but

also

Linking Words

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

pre-requisite for

entring

Correct your spelling

entering

show examples

the job market.

This

Linking Words

essay argued

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

why skill is more important than academic subjects which have been taught in schools,

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

I strongly believe that talented and

skillful

Change the spelling

skilful

show examples

employees are preferred by corporates these days as their perspective is high income.

keyhan454Wed Feb 28 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Focus on a more structured approach to organizing paragraphs. Begin with a clear topic sentence, followed by supporting arguments, and conclude with a reinforcing or summarizing statement per paragraph.

Task Achievement

To improve task response, make sure to directly address the prompt in both the introduction and conclusion, clearly stating your opinion. Provide a balanced view if you're discussing both sides of the argument.

Task Achievement

Incorporate more specific examples and real-world scenarios to support your arguments. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion

Pay attention to spelling and grammatical correctness to maintain the professionalism and readability of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

344 words

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These days, school should focus more on producing young people who have the skills required to join the workforce, rather than focusing on academic subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

Your opinion

Many people in the music business feel that illegal music sites on the internet are a serious threat to the industry and more should be done to prevent them from operating. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people say that the government should spend more money taking care of elderly people while others think that government spending should be spent more on the education of young people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Modern technology in now very common in most workplaces. How do you thik this has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying to much on technology?