IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?

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In today's Mechanichal era,
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion is a pervasive issue in large cities worldwide, cities are stuck with vehicles and creating
traffic
Use synonyms
 jams on
roads
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss how
excessive
Change the article
an excessive
the excessive
show examples
 number of automobiles and outdated public
transport
Use synonyms
 system are the main
caused
Replace the word
causes
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
 problem and the most viable solution ,
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
 improve
communal
Correct article usage
the communal
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transport
Use synonyms
 system and reduce the
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
roads
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, I think the prime reason for
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 is
highly
Change the adverb
high
show examples
 dependency on personal
transport
Use synonyms
. In every household multiple
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
cars,
Correct word choice
and bike
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bike
Fix the agreement mistake
bikes
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owned
Add a missing verb
are owned
show examples
 by a family ,
each
Correct word choice
and each
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 individual have their own wheels
hence
Linking Words
 they do not prefer to use communal transit.
Secondly
Linking Words
, another main reason is the inadequate infrastructure in the nation. As we see, Many urban areas have road networks that were designed and built decades ago. As compared to
current
Add an article
the current
show examples
 volume of
traffic
Use synonyms
these network
Change the determiner
this network
these networks
show examples
 cannot
copup
Correct your spelling
cope
 with the present
traffic
Use synonyms
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
leading to blocking.
For instance
Linking Words
, in some cities of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Uttarpradesh public
prefer
Correct subject-verb agreement
prefers
show examples
 going by their own commuter because of
very
Correct article usage
the very
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 bad network and broken
roads
Use synonyms
 . A feasible approach to deal with
this
Linking Words
 issue is in the
hand
Fix the agreement mistake
hands
show examples
 of
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
as well as
Linking Words
citizens
Correct article usage
the citizens
show examples
. By making strict
law
Fix the agreement mistake
laws
show examples
 regarding to number of wheels a family
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Investing in more reliable ,
advance
Wrong verb form
advanced
show examples
 and frequent public
transport
Use synonyms
for example
Linking Words
 buses, trains,
subways
Correct word choice
and subways
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 so , the public will
encourage
Wrong verb form
be encouraged
show examples
 to use public transportation.Establish park and ride facilities at key locations outside the city
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 encourages commuters to switch from their cars to public
transport
Use synonyms
 for the remainder of their journey
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
lastly
Linking Words
 building new
roads
Use synonyms
, make them wide ,
building
Correct word choice
and building
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 new connectivity so, the flow will be light. In conclusion, I believe that making rules
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
 not having more vehicles,building new connectivity and
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
making
improvement
Fix the agreement mistake
improvements
show examples
 in public
transport
Use synonyms
 can
undoubtelly
Correct your spelling
undoubtedly
 resolve the trouble of excessive
traffic
Use synonyms
 on
roads
Use synonyms
.

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structure
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea and be clearly connected to your overall argument.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as consequently, moreover) effectively but not excessively. This helps in connecting ideas more smoothly.
task response
Clearly address all parts of the task. Make sure your essay directly addresses the questions asked, including both causes and solutions for the issue.
language use
Avoid repetition of ideas and phrases. Aim for a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to make your essay more engaging and demonstrate your language skills.
examples
Provide specific examples to support your points. This makes your arguments more convincing and demonstrates an understanding of the topic.
paragraphing
Consider paragraphing for easier readability. Each new idea or point should start with a new paragraph.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • urban population
  • public transportation
  • urban planning
  • infrastructure
  • economic strength
  • consumerism
  • car ownership
  • commuting
  • peak hours
  • public transit
  • carpooling
  • ride-sharing
  • remote work
  • flexible working hours
  • cycling infrastructure
  • congestion charges
  • traffic management systems
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